I released a huff of breath and threw my body down, letting the back of my head hit my pillow. “He left it here a few weeks ago when he told me he wasn’t my friend.”
She shuffled up onto her knees. “Well, I mean,wereyou friends?”
“We never put a label on it, but I kinda thought we were starting to become friends.”
“Why would he say that, anyway?”
I dropped my gaze to the sheets. “I may have asked him why he doesn't get along with his father.” I sighed as the words came out, then raised my eyes to see her gawking at me.
“Why in gods’ names would you ask him that?” she blurted out.
“I don’t know!” I yelled, mostly at myself. “We were getting along. He was being nice to me. We were making jokes.” I threw my arms up in frustration. “He’s always questioning me about where I am or what I'm doing, so I figured one little question couldn't hurt. But it did, and he stormed out. Now he will hardly talk to me again, just like when we first met, which is a problem because I can't stop thinking about how I upset him and his eyes and his body…and—” I stopped myself abruptly. I most certainlyhad notplanned on sharing that information with Pia, but once I started ranting, the words spilled right out of me.
She rubbed her eyes, then stared at me for a good while before her mouth twisted into a smile.
“What?” I groaned, scrunching my face.
“You totally have the hots for my cousin.”
I shook my head. “No, I do not. He's absolutely breathtaking—I'll give him that. But that's beside the point.” I ignored Pia’s giddy smile and sat upright. “The point is that he got pissed and has been cold to me ever since. And what am I supposed to do with this?” I grabbed his book from her, waving the novel above my head.
Her smile faded. “Maeve, I told you that Sebastian doesn't share a lot with anyone. Half of the things I know about him are simply because we are family.”
I turned my face away from her, but she stood up and moved in front of me so that I had no choice but to look at her. “I think he struggles with things from his past more than he'll ever let on. He probably reacted the way he did as a defense mechanism to hide that those things actually hurt him,” she continued.
She could be right. He told me I could ask him anything, but his mood switched when I brought up his father. If what Pia told me was true, Sebastian had endured a hell of a lot of trauma in his life, and I'm sure there was more than she even knew.
“Well now I feel even worse,” I whined, angry at myself for causing him any suffering.
A devious grin formed across Pia's face. She swiped my rucksack from my desk, shoving Sebastian's book into it before handing me the bag and telling me, “Get dressed.”
I tendedto sleep in on the weekends, so Sebastian waited until mid-morningto meet me at my dormitory. Knowing that, Pia and I were able to leave my room uninterrupted.
“Where are we going?” The crisp fall air had me wrapping my arms around myself for extra warmth as we hiked across the castle grounds. I really needed to start remembering my cloak.
“To get breakfast,” Pia said simply, keeping her feet steady on the cobblestone walkway.
“That's it? Just to get breakfast?” My suspicion was obvious.
“Well, after that we're going to give Seb his book back.”
I pivoted and started walking back towards the dorms. “Nope. Absolutely not!” I yelled over my shoulder and waved her goodbye.
She chased after me, grabbing onto my arm and dragging me back in the direction of the castle. She was a few inches shorter than me and much smaller, but I had to admit that the girl was strong.
“You see him every day. What’s the difference?”
“The difference is that…I—” I struggled to find the words to explain my reasoning.
“Don't be a baby,” she teased, flashing me her teeth in a taunting smile.
I rolled my eyes at her, but didn't argue any further. I let her lead me to the castle, where we shoveled down our breakfast and then chatted to kill some time.
“Sebastian usually meets me around ten thirty,” I told her as I glanced at the clock hanging on the stonework of the kitchen. It was about ten o’clock now, so he'd be making his way to my room any minute.
Hastily, we picked up after ourselves and gathered our belongings. I started towards the exit, but Pia ushered me through a stone archway on the other side of the kitchen.
“This way. There's another way into the soldiers' housing,” she whispered to me.
