My large, well-lit room was all I saw day after day. There was an enormous bed on a platform, draped in a heavy quilt with exquisitely designed patterns. Three wide windows overlooked the city, and a tall, broad leafed plant stood in a pot on the floor in the corner. There was a comfortable sofa, and four chairs carved from dark, polished wood witharmrests made to look like scowling dragon heads. There was also a cozy spot to write letters and stacks of untouched papers and books on a small shelf beside it. Large mirrors in golden frames, and beautiful art hung on the walls.
“Milady, should we take a walk in the garden?”
I turned my head, watching the petite maid. She approached my bed and looked at me with a mixture of concern and quiet determination.
“I . . . don’t know.”
“Fresh air and exercise will help you feel better,” she insisted.
“I suppose.” I sighed.
“Milady, forgive me for speaking without permission, I think that there are some good men among your suitors.”
Sally helped me get up, and started removing my peignoir. I stood obediently while she helped me put on a modest, light pink, muslin dress, then sat as she braided my hair.
“You really think so?” I closed my eyes fighting a wave of fatigue.
“Yes. Lord Rutherford isn’t married and has no children. He’s handsome too,” she quickly added.
I glanced in the mirror and saw a frail, sickly figure with a purplish tint beneath her eyes, pale lips and pronounced cheekbones. I looked like someone I no longer recognized.
“Here, if you could move this way.” Sally navigated me to the door and pushed it wide open to let me go through.
The long corridor of the palace was empty. Except for thesentries stationed at every corner, there was no one else. Each and every one of them wore the colors of the blue clan. I kept my head high, well aware that all of them had their eyes on the sacred bride.
Sally talked cheerfully about mundane things as we descended the carpeted set of stairs.Moments later, she just stopped speaking as she slowed her pace, and lowered her gaze.
I caught her discreetly eyeing one of the guards.
We continued through the main entryway with two grand staircases situated side by side and moved to a spacious green house. Hundreds of different types of trees, bushy shrubs and blooming plants filled the entire area with a mix of floral and woodsy scents. I lifted my eyes to the ceiling, drawn to the cloudy sky shifting above.
In many ways, I felt like one of the flowers that was grown in the confinement of the glass room, too fragile to survive on its own, and too rare to be left alone.
“The doctor said that you should exert yourself more often. These walks may be the thing you need to restore you to good health.”
“Do you really think so?” I asked, fighting the weakness in my limbs.
“I believe that with care, and proper discipline, anything’s possible,” the girl responded.
“I think if I took less of the medicine, it would make me feel much better.”
“That would not do. Your awful nightmares could come back and then you’ll stop sleeping all together,” she reasoned.
I turned away. She was right, of course. I could still remember the darkness, the void, the unspeakable terror that I felt when the dreams came back. The mere thought of having those dreams again made me shiver. And yet, I could not help feeling that the medicine took away more than it gave me. I glanced at my maid, but said nothing.
At last we approached the exit and Sally pushed the heavy, wooden door and waited for me to pass through.
Outside, the day was cloudy and moist, but it felt warm despite the dampness of the breeze. I filled my lungs with air and turned my face up, enjoying the soft light on my skin. A couple of droplets of moisture landed on my face and I squinted my eyes.
A sudden shadow of a feeling of something familiar hit me unexpectedly, but I ignored it. I used to concentrate on the sensation and I tried so hard to remember what it was. Then I just stopped trying, it got me nowhere. Everything outside my quiet life seemed like a blur of unconnected flashes I could not comprehend. I could not recall anything other than the palace, and waiting for a betrothal.
What was my life like before this? Where was my family? Did I even have any?
My head started to spin, and I took a deep breath.
“Milady? What’s wrong?” Sally was by my side in an instant.
“I don’t feel so good.”
