“I should not be telling you this, but Mr. Payton adjusted your medicine, and everyone's so happy that you’re feeling better.” Sally continued.
“Oh, yes.” I forced a smile.
“From now on you are expected to come down for dinner so you can see all of the possible suitors. Isn’t that lovely?”
“Yes! That’s great.” I tried to sound cheerful.
“I’ll come after the afternoon tea to help you dress for dinner.”
“Thank you, Sally.”
After she was gone, I paced the room for some time before opening the door at last.
Kent stood by the window, gazing out at the uneven contours of the buildings below.
“Mr. Kent?”
My breath caught in my chest, when he turned toward me. He was so astonishingly, otherworldly handsome that every time I laid eyes on him, I forgot how to breathe.
He said nothing, just looked at me with his dark, almost liquid, umber eyes.
I wanted him to close the distance between us. To wrap his arms around me, press me against his chest, and make me feel something other than hollow emptiness. I wanted that so bad. I wanted him.
“Could you take me to the garden, please?”
Still silent, he stepped closer, extending his hand to me, and I took it.
For a moment, his warmth drowned out every worry, every ounce of anxiety. I basked in it, savoring his proximity. It was a sweet, forbidden secret. One I would never share with anyone.
“I remembered something and I want to ask you about it,” I said when we entered the overgrown part of the garden.
He turned, and his eyes searched my face. I could not read him, and it felt like something I should be able to do. I inhaled, briefly closing my eyes, and told him about the blond man in my dreams.
Ken’s eyes immediately hardened. I could see a tiny muscle in his jaw twitch as his expression turned to stone.
“I believe you were engaged a long time ago.”
“Engaged? What happened?”
“He was killed.”
I lowered my gaze. It explained so much. I knew we had been close, but I did not think of him with any pain. Instead, a soft, sorrowful feeling of loss was all that remained. I looked around, noticing that we were standing in the same clearing as before, secluded from any curious gazes if anyone happened to be in this part of the gardens.
“Did we . . . you and I . . . Were we engaged?”
It was difficult, so difficult to ask. But I had to know, even if it was uncomfortable and terrifying. I had to know or it would drive me crazy.
“No.”
“Oh. I see.”
Out of nowhere, a new pain squeezed my heart and would not let go. I thought, I hoped, that maybe, the things that he said earlier meant that we were once a couple. For some reason, knowing that we were not pained me.
I glanced at Kent once more, uncertainty swirling inside me. His face was a mask, unreadable and closed off. I could not reach him, could not pierce through his calm, collected exterior. I was at a loss for what to do.
“I think I need to return to my room before Sally noticed my absence.” I took a step back.
“Alina.”
