“It’s no trouble. I’ll go to the library straight away. Is there anything in particular you would like?” she asked.
“I’m not sure.” I frowned too weak to form a complete thought.
“I’m not a big reader, ma’am. I’ll do my best.” She picked up my clothes and hurried out of the room.
When she was gone, I fell back on the pillows exhausted.
The frailty of my body seemed to have affected me in many other ways, because no matter how hard I tried, I could not concentrate on anything. Something was seriously wrong with both my body and my mind.
CHAPTER FOUR
ALINA
Things had changed after the attack, and no matter where I went, Kent was trailing me. When I wanted to get some fresh air, a whole group of sentries gathered within my line of sight, careful not to crowd.
I inhaled, and looked past the lines of trees, to the lacy, milky white clouds sailing across the pure shade of ultramarine above. The sun was shining through the perfectly shaped leaves with a distinct golden hue. So much beauty was in front of me, and yet I could not fully enjoy it. I was trapped in the confinement of the never-ending haze that separated me from the world. None of what I sawtouched my soul. All of my senses were obstructed by the sickness that took everything away from me. I was vaguely aware that the perfect colors all around me had practically lost their value, that I lacked any joy in experiencing it first hand. I could barely remember how it used to feel to marvel at the wonders of nature.
I shifted on the bench and wrapped my shoulders in the thin shawl.
Sally did not want to admit it, but she was too traumatized to join me in the garden. When I took my daily exercise, there was only Kent by my side.
I shifted my gaze back to my companion. He was freshly shaven, and his hair looked slightly wavy, and a little damp. I would not want to admit it to anyone, but there was something about him that made it impossible to keep my eyes away. He was considerably taller than most of the men in the palace. He was also built as a warrior, with a lean, well-proportioned body. More than once I caught the looks from the court women who often blatantly stared at him. When I thought of how I was no better, the corners of my mouth lifted, and I looked away.
Lady Corliss insisted that I spend more time with my possible suitors, but I was too weak most days to even get out of bed. Still, that was not a major concern to anyone. As long as I could stand through the wedding ceremony, even supported by two maids, that would be good enough for the council, I was sure of it.
“Milady.” Sally hurried down the path, her long, light grey dress brushed against the gravel.
For a moment, I could only stare at the way she held her back artificially straight while rushing toward me with a familiar glass in her hand.
I looked down, noticing my fingers had tightened around the edge of the stone bench. I loathed the way the mixture made me feel, too drowsy, too weak. The mere thought of ingesting it twisted my insides and made me want to retch.
“Here’s your medicine.” She breathed heavily.
“Thank you,” I said, but only stared at the glass, not willing to touch it.
Unintentionally, I caught the sharp expression in Kent’s eyes as he scrutinized the glass with a frown on his face.
“Milady, please. You know how important it is to take your whitebane on time. It’s better to avoid any episodes.” Sally brought the glass closer and I took it, biting my lip.
My fingers clenched the surface of the glass, gazing at the thick, cloudy liquid.
What did I know about medicine? Maybe this was the only reason I was able to function at all? What if I became completely bedridden without it?
I brought the glass to my lips and took a small tentative sip. The bitterness burned my throat and I fought the wave of nausea that came with the awful taste of whitebane. Sally stayed with me until I finished every drop, and without delay, walked back to the palace.
“Why are you taking that?” Kent said and I turned my head meeting his eyes.
It was the first time he had ever referred to me, and out of all the things he could have said, he chose to say something that was already on my mind.
“Excuse me?”
“Why are you taking medicine?” he calmly repeated.
“I don’t see how it’s any of your business,” I said a little harsher than I intended.
It was rude of him, and completely inappropriate.Why did he think that he could act with such familiarity toward me?
“Do you not care about your own health?” Kent continued.
