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He stands, turning to face me full on. His chest is wide and tanned, the ink etched into his skin beautifully. Nate isn’t bulky, he’s lean, cut to perfection for his height. He has large angel wings tattooed over his chest and one arm covered with a sleeve, including old English font that goes over his ribcage. “I got our daughter back, that’s what. And from now on, she’s not leaving this fucking house, you hear me?”
I open my mouth and then slam it closed. “I get that you’re her dad, Nate, but she’s mine too—”
“—yeah?” He yanks open his belt and flicks his button until his jeans are hanging off his lean hips. I divert my eyes, nervous that he would pick up on my gawking. “Good fucking entry she has gotten from you so far, Tillie. Top job.”
“Fuck you.” I’m raging, hanging dangerously close to the line of not giving a flying shit and saying what I want. “I did what I could for her—always!”
His eyes stay on mine. “Like lie to me?”
I still, running my palms down my pants. “I—”
“—Save it. Get in the shower, put one of my shirts on, and get your ass into bed. I need to sleep, and then tomorrow, we will talk about the next steps we take from here.”
I exhale, exhausted from today but relieved I have my daughter back and admittedly, it is thanks to Nate, but it makes me nervous that I don’t know what one of my lies he knows up to this point. Going straight for his dresser, I yank open his shirt drawer and dive into the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I hit the faucet and place Nate’s shirt on the bathroom counter, squeezing the curve of the sink and slowly counting to ten.
I’m at seven when Madison’s entry to the bathroom opens and she freezes. “Shit, sorry!”
I shake my head, smiling at her. “It’s okay.”
She walks into the bathroom. Really need to remember that I need to lock her side too. This bathroom and the secrets that are contained between the walls is enough to make a priest burst into flames.
I flip down the toilet cover and take a seat.
Madison’s eyes go to Nate’s door and she leans closer to me. “Are you okay? He can’t hear anything in here. These walls are actually pretty soundproof.”
I chuckle, tucking my hair behind my ear. A tear drops from my eye, but I quickly swipe it away.
“Tillie,” Madison sighs, her hand coming to my knee. “He will come around. Maybe just give him time?”
“Nate?” I ask, confused. “Oh, yeah no that’s not what I’m upset about. As much as I know it looks most of the time because we’re always fighting, I can handle him.”
Her face softens and her eyes crinkle around the edges. “I know.” Then she sinks down onto the floor. “You’re actually one of the few people who can.”
I lick my lips, the salt hitting the tip of my tongue.
“What’s wrong then, babe? You know we’re practically sisters, so…” she jokes, shoving my legs.
If only that were true.
“It’s just, I don’t know, Mads. It seems I can’t do anything right. I’m a failure. What am I going to do from here? Nate holds all the cards as far as Micaela is concerned. And that’s not even mentioning my crazy stupid life. I’m broke, I’m not starting college with you guys after the holidays. I’m a mess.” I shake my head, my thoughts swimming dangerously close to the dark side of the ocean. I think they’re all starting NYU. Even Tatum, and Nate, I think. Nate and Tatum… shit.
“Well, Bishop isn’t, if that makes you feel better.”
I roll my eyes. “That’s because he’s a legacy or whatever and now he has to play Papa King.”
Madison bursts out laughing and it’s not long before I’m joining her. My tears soon dry and my stomach throbs. “God, I missed this.”
Madison’s hand comes to my knee. “Me too. Well, don’t get mad, but you can live here. I heard Elena and my dad talking and they want to offer you the pool house. Just… act surprised when they ask you.”
I freeze, my eyes stretching wide. “I could never—”
“Tillie,” Madison starts. The twinkling in her eye has started. It happens every time she’s about to get real. “You are family now. You have my niece, Elena’s grandchild, Nate’s child. Every decision you make is going to impact her. So please, just—think of her when you make the decision. The pool house is well away from Nate yet not so far that he gets anxiety with being away from Micaela, because that’s what’s going to happen. He won’t be letting her out of his sight—forever, probably.”
I sigh, standing from the toilet. “I guess I have a lot to think about.”
