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Ouch.
I yank my face out of his grip, my heart sinking to the bottom of the ocean. “You’re right. That’s my bad. You do you, Nate.” I can’t even be bothered arguing with him right now. I’m too angry at his words.
He steals another pancake. “And that’s not why I’m mad at her.”
I clench my jaw, my anger refusing to let go.
He carries on. “It’s because—”
“—because it’s not fucking you,” I finish for him, piling the last of the pancakes up. This has always been an issue for me, how he cares for Madison. I’m irrational, I know, but we all want to be the only one. Not the one of two.
He doesn’t answer, only making me even more angry as I flip off the switch to the griddle and snatch the plate of pancakes. I ignore him as he’s clearly watching me move around the kitchen, and then I leave, going outside to where the rest of The Kings are, all of their eyes lighting up on the pancakes. I sit down beside Eli and Hunter, leaning back on my chair. Brantley is opposite me, unmoving. I zone out on the pancakes and watch as everyone digs in, only I’ve lost my appetite. A foot connects with mine under the table and I glance up to Brantley, who’s watching me carefully.
“You okay?” He mouths, searching my eyes.
I’m not.
I’m more than not okay. I wanted to be the stronger person and reign hell on Nate, but I can’t. All I can do, is move on. I need to move on and away from his toxicity. I’ll never be his. If I was Madison, he wouldn’t have treated me this way. I realize that now.
I shake my head, skating off the chair and storming back to my room. I need to get out of this fucking house. I fly past Daemon’s room, but he’s once again not there.
It makes me worse. I can feel my mind spiraling and I don’t like the way it makes me feel. I kick open my door and yank out the same clothes I was wearing yesterday, slipping in and out of the shower. When I reenter, Bishop is standing at my open door, his eyes on mine.
“Hey,” I whisper, reaching for my clothes while clenching the towel around my body. Can I have a few seconds away from all of these assholes? I mentally remind myself to invite Madison out this morning. I need to be around girls.
“Is there something that you’re not telling me about the Madison thing?” he asks, licking his lip.
I shake my head, gripping my clothes. “Even if I did, Bishop, my loyalty will always be to her. She’s my best friend and I would never do anything to mistreat that trust.”
He tilts his head, his eyes going up and down my body. “Even though she and Nate are so close? That has never aggravated you. How?”
I exhale, sitting on my bed. I guess we’re having that talk. “Because I’m nothing to Nate. I was something, the mother to—” I pause, my eyes closing. “But in essence, he’s never loved me. He has n—”
Bishop shakes his head. “Girls and their need for love. That’s part of the problem.” He enters my room farther, leaning back against the wall.
“Love isn’t unreasonable if you’ve poured everything into one person,” I remind him.
“I did that,” Bishop says, his eyes on mine. “And she broke my fucking heart. Now I’m feeling unhinged.”
The energy in the room shifts.
He wouldn’t.
His eyes drop to my mouth.
Okay so maybe he would?
“I’m not going to fuck you, Tillie. Chill out. I’m not that kind of guy. I have to admit that it would make me feel a fucking shit load better what with her and Nate.”
I exhale, relaxing. “Except I mean nothing to Nate.” I roll my eyes, standing up to make my way back into the bathroom.
Bishop takes one step forward. I freeze. He’s so close, towering over me like a mountain.
I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I’m tempted by the idea of making myself feel better by hurting Nate, but no way in hell would that ever be with Bishop. Madison needs to talk with him before he makes a bad decision.
My door swings open, and Bishop steps back quickly.
Eli scans Bishop and me.
“What?” Bishop snaps before storming out of the room.
Okay that looked bad. It was nothing and that looked like it was something.
“Well, well, well, looks like you’re finally learning the game…” Eli teases and then exits the room without even telling me what he came down here for.
I groan, going straight for the bathroom and changing before this gets worse. I need to buy a car today. And undies.
Tillie
With Bailey bailing on me at the last minute, I’m here waiting for Madison in Brantley’s car. I could have taken Nate’s, but I don’t want to give him any more reason to talk to me. The deep V8 growls under my ass and I regret not taking maybe one of his new cars. Which reminds me, how the fuck am I going to park this big beast in town?
