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“The fact that you didn’t fight for me.” There’s a long stretch of silence before I hear him move from his chair.
I bring my hand up, stopping him. “No. You stay there and I’ll be over here. It’s the only way we can drain out all of each other’s information without it leading to sex.”
He stops before finally peddling backward and flopping back down onto his seat.
“And then after?” I ask. “Why didn’t you tell me you knew she was alive after you knew I wasn’t crazy?”
He clears his throat. “I had to figure out if you remembered. Then when I figured you did, I wanted to know why you were so eager to keep her from me. I found that out obviously last night.”
Running my hands over my face, I shake my head. “I’m sorry. I—I thought I was doing the right thing, keeping her away until all of this was figured out. She was safe with Jess.”
“I don’t hate you for that, Isa. You did what you had to do, and it showed your humanity.”
“So why the back and forth with me, then? Why was it all I want you, no I don’t, yes I do, no I don’t…” I breathe out, tilting my head to the side until I’m pinning him with my glare. “We had already gone through all of that, why put me through it again?”
He got up from his chair but before I could stop him this time, he took the few steps to me and dropped down opposite. “Look at me.”
I did. It was truth time and I wanted truth. “Why?”
His eyes softened. Fucking softened. Never seen them like that in my life—except when it came to Harper. “Losing you that first time was fucking unbearable. I couldn’t—” He swallows roughly, and I watch as his Adam’s apple swells when he swallows. “I couldn’t go through falling in love with you all over again just to lose you all over again. Fuck, baby.” This time his finger is beneath my chin and he’s tilting my face up, bringing me level with him. “I fought hard when you got back. I wanted you. Needed you. Having you walk around me like that damn near killed me, you hear? I was terrified that if I let my guard down with you again, that you’d only raise your weapons.”
A single tear fell from my eye.
He swiped it with his finger. “Loving you is a constant battle, but it’s a war I’m willing to die for.”
A sob liberates out of me, my head falling onto his shoulder as waves of defeat wash over me. He curls his arm around my back. “I love you, Bryant. That never stopped.”
He kisses me on the top of my head. “I know, baby. I love you too, and god fucking help anyone who interferes with that.”
“Think my father is an example of that.” I chuckle, swiping the tears from my eyes and leaning backward. “Speaking of, what are you doing with his body?” I haven’t given much thought to Lydia or Brianna since I’ve been back, and that’s not because I’ve given up caring—well yes to Lydia—but no to Brianna, for now. It’s more because I’ve been so fixated on making sure Bryant and I are okay. I’ve never been able to focus on multiple things at a time. It confuses my overactive brain.
“Well, fuck.” Bryant grins, running his hand over his scruff. “That’s up to you, baby. Pig farm or Hart Island?”
“You still own that pig farm?” I ask, shocked. “I thought you were joking about that?”
“Why would I joke about owning a pig farm?” he asks with complete sincerity, cocking his head back.
Jesus Christ.
“I don’t know.” My arms fly up into the air. “To scare me!”
“Pssh.” Bryant smirks, tapping my leg. “Please. You give yourself way too much fucking credit. Pig farm it is.” He stands from the bench seat that sits across the window, but I reach for his hand, stopping him.
“Wait.”
He looks down at me.
I shake my head. “Hart Island. I don’t—” I swallow.
“I get it, baby. You still want the stupid fuck to be buried. Deadbeat motherfucker.”
“Correct.”
“Too much humanity,” he grunts, taking a seat back on his chair. “Next issue. Max.” He runs his index finger over his lip, obviously gauging my reaction.
“What do you mean?” I ask, my hostility fragrant. “Max has been there for me through everything.”
Bryant leans forward. “Isa, he worked for your father. Something doesn’t add up.”
I huff, folding my arms in front of myself. “I refuse to believe that.”
Bryant shrugs. “Don’t give a fuck, babe. What I say goes, and all things considered, I would say I’m a more credible source.” He grins. “Don’t you?”
I fight the urge to stand up and punch him straight in his pretty face. I flip him off instead. “Fine. We can figure that out as we go, but for now?”
