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The thick aroma of smoke, ash, and cologne swiftly seizes the room, and I know what they’ve done. Burned the damn house down. Delila.
“They’re preparing her for a funeral in two days from now.” King pushes through the room, going straight for the mini bar on the other side of the fireplace that’s burning behind Draya’s chair. “I’ve already got the crew and girls on the first flight here. Killian hasn’t told Maya yet…”
I freeze.
King continues. “But he will when she lands.”
Kaius shoves his hands in his pocket, looking at all of us in the room. All of the Four Fathers, their wives, The Brothers, and myself. “Delila being taken means someone will have to step up to run the show. Ideally, it is supposed to be Maya, since that has always been a Patrova role to do, but there’s Perse.”
Killian’s leg jiggles against mine and I can almost feel his anxiety seep into my pores. “You can’t give that role to Perse. She’s a hybrid.”
“But,” King adds, bringing his eyes to Killian. “Perse and Delila were really fuckin’ close. I’m not sayin’ that Maya shouldn’t step up, but I’m saying I think Perse is the right person to do this. Maya has a lot of growing to do, and besides that, she has just lost her mom.” King shakes his head. “You know Maya, brother. She’s going to lose herself, be reckless, and do a whole bunch of shit that she shouldn’t do. We can re-evaluate when the time comes, but I think Perse knows enough, was close enough, and is crazy enough to take that throne for now—until we need to re-evaluate.”
I put my hand up as if I’m in a fucking school session. “What would that mean for the ringmaster? Delila was that too, and Perse can’t do that on top of everything else.” Just as the words leave my mouth, Kyrin walks in, slipping his gun back into the waistband of his jeans.
“Lilith…” I whisper. I can’t help the smile that stretches over my face. “You have to use Lilith.”
Killian leans forward, glaring at me. “We’re not using our enemy.”
I shake my head, bringing my attention to him. “Lilith is black and white. She doesn’t think in colors. She isn’t your enemy. She’d be your nothing.”
“What are you saying?” Kaius asks cautiously.
My eyes swing around the room. “I’m saying that Lilith doesn’t see the world like we do. She doesn’t have a moral compass.”
“Was she born like that?” Draya questions. “Was she born retarded?”
“Shut the fuck up, Ma!” Killian snaps at her.
I ignore them both, while tucking it away in my brain to get to the bottom of why he hates her so much—aside from the fact that she’s a massive bitch.
“No,” I answer Draya, without paying her any attention. “She wasn’t. When she was a child, she was always crazy. She would talk a lot, do a lot of weird things for the sake of adrenaline, but after the years, life has worn on her—and it shows.”
“You killed her dad. She will want blood,” King answers.
I chuckle, shaking my head. “You guys still don’t get it, do you?” When no one answers, I take a sip of my whiskey and clear my throat. “You all may be killers, and horrifying ones at that, but you all have one thing in common. Loyalty. Patience isn’t like that. We don’t have loyalty as a morality. We have the killing, the rape, the human trafficking, the at times, incest, but we have no loyalty. No brotherhood. No friendships. Lilith doesn’t know any of those things. She would come in and be a reliable asset to Midnight Mayhem.”
“How so?” Kyrin is the one to ask a question now.
I bring my eyes to his. “Because she was the ringmaster for Patience, and well, I’m sure you remember the ringmaster—right?”
Kyrin’s face flashes with recollection. “That was her?”
I nod. “Yes, so, I think—”
“—She’s right. Lilith should be the ringmaster.”
Kallisto steps forward, watching me. “This will be on you if it fails, Saskia.”
“I wouldn’t have mentioned it if I didn’t already know it.”
Killian grabs for his hair and tugs. “Still not with this idea. You want to plant a goddamn enemy and put her in the center of our show, and give the rest of the responsibility to Perse, who is herself new to this?” He stands and rushes out of the kitchen, slamming the door behind his retreat.
I feel everyone’s eyes turn to me, as if I hold the answers. As if I hold the key to Killian’s frustrations.
I don’t. No one does. That’s a key that doesn’t exist.
The funeral was dark, and King was right, Maya isn’t handling it well at all. We flew home from Kiznitch yesterday after staying for two days for the funeral. Killian and I haven’t spoken much at all, and anytime he tries, I find myself moving away from him. To be honest, I’ve been battling with a lot inside of myself since finding out about who he is and his role in my life, in who I am.
