“Back to the gifts.”
“Oh, that depends on the person, and if you care what other people think.”
Jesse considered that for a moment and thought of Lily-Grace. All he cared about was how he made her feel.
“That’s not a problem.”
“Well, I say go big or go home. Brit and I both love a quality extravagant gift. I think people just go wrong with the presentation. Like find out if Lily-Grace is the kind of person who wants to receive a big gift in front of an audience or if she’s more of a private gal. And give her the emotional space to turn it down if it’s a bit too much.”
“I think I can handle that. One last stupid question, and then I’ll go shower your wife with praise. You consider me a friend?”
“What? Of course I do. Brit and I love you. What makes you say that?”
“Some people enjoy Zach’s company and include me as an add-on.”
“No. Zach is great. He’s my friend too, but in a ‘baby brother you wanna fight’ sort of way. You’re ... you,” she said, her tone kind, which was odd for Delfi. She was the queen of tough love. “I definitely don’t think of you as some sort of add-on. You shouldn’t think of yourself that way either.”
“Thank you. I appreciate that. I’m thinking of asking Dr. Kuaea if he wants to grab a beer at Claim Jumpers. See if he wants to be a ‘friend outside of the ranch’ kind of friend.”
“That’s a great idea. He seems like a good guy. New in town. It would be downright neighborly of you. Two more of my cents?”
“Sure.”
“Don’t invite Zach,” she said with a cool shrug.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean you guys do everything together, and maybe if you want to start fresh with a new friendship, go solo for once. Don’t invite Lilah either, even though she told me they are dating. What the fuck is in the water over at Pleasant Lane?”
“Hell if I know, but I’m just gonna go with it.”
* * *
Dr. Brooks was patient while Jesse gathered his thoughts. He had this hour to himself. His phone was on Do Not Disturb, and Erin had explicit instructions to hold all calls and visitors unless the ranch was on fire. This time was his, he’d finally come to accept, but he was having a hard time finding the words.
“Sorry. I have a lot to share, I’m just debating where to start.”
“Why don’t you start with the thing that’s got you blocked up?”
Dr. Brooks didn’t know Jesse’s family. Well, he did from their respective films and television shows.Rory’s Warhad just been renewed for two more seasons, so that would keep Miss Leona busy—but his therapist didn’tknowthem. Not like Jesse did. He spit the words out before he buried them deep again. “I think I hate my father.”
He thought saying it out loud would make him feel bad. Or guilty, but it didn’t. “I love him. He’s my father. He gave me a great life, set a good example of how to be a good husband, but I hate him.”
“Jesse Senior.”
“Yes. I’m named after him.” It should have been a point of pride, but sometimes it just made him want to grind his teeth.
“You haven’t mentioned your parents much since we’ve started talking. What’s your relationship like with them?”
“Odd,” Jesse said truthfully. He always had a sense his dad had wanted more sons, not to fill his house with kids, but because he felt like Jesse had been a test run that hadn’t gone quite right. Jesse shared that with Dr. Brooks, ignoring the pain it opened up in his chest.
“Both of my parents and my grandparents are, were, really outgoing people, and I’m just not. My grandparents understood that, but my parents, they just ... handed me off to my grandparents and tried again. Zachariah and Samuel, the true heir and the spare. And they made it clear they were extra disappointed in me for not getting married first. And then Sam started seeing someone they like.” Jesse needed to stop talking about this. It wasn’t important, not in the grand scheme of things, but he’d opened a release valve he didn’t know how to shut off. “But now . . .”
“What’s changed?”
“I’m seeing someone.” Jesse glanced at the clock and did his best to give Dr. Brooks a PG version of everything that had happened since they’d last spoken.
“It sounds like a busy weekend, but how are you feeling about that relationship?”
