“It is manageable in a way that it will not cause awful backlash,” she said slowly. “Well, a little. Only… There is another way. I suppose it is riskier. But it would require honesty.”
“And the lie, whatever it is, is less harmful?”
She had to bite back the urge to sigh again. “For now, yes. But years from now… Oh, I cannot imagine it, Margaret. It feels awfully wrong. It is one matter to deceive the ton. But a person’s entire life… Don’t we deserve to know our own lives?”
The perplexing expression on her sister’s face was hardly hopeful. And yet Isla supposed it should be.
At least it means she hasn’t a clue about what I am saying. She won’t know a thing about Oliver and Ronan. Perhaps no one will. Just a handful of people…
“Isla? You’re looking rather pale. Are you ill?”
Lacy gasped loudly. She was closer than Isla had been paying attention. Crawling over with one hand out, Lacey nearly face-planted whilst stumbling on her skirt in her haste to get to them. She found Isla’s foot first. “What? Sick? How pale? Is she feverish?”
Shaking her head, Isla gently nudged her away. “I’m quite all right.”
“It’s all right if you die. I can marry the duke for you,” her little sister said in earnest.
“Lacey!” Isla tried to be mad but Margaret had burst out laughing and she had to hide a chuckle of her own. Clapping a hand over her mouth, she walloped Margaret on the knee. “Shh. Lacey, that isn’t very nice.”
The girl pouted. “I thought it was. I’m only trying to be thoughtful.”
“She adores your duke,” Margaret said with a chuckle.
“Who wouldn’t? He’s marvelous,” Lacey insisted with a broad smile. She clambered up to feel Isla’s forehead. “You’re not hot. If anything, you’re clammy. That’s rather disgusting.”
Isla apparently couldn’t win with her sisters today. She shook her head. “You’re obnoxious. Is it because of the rain? I thought you like the rain.”
“I do, when I’m permitted outside in it. But now Mother thinks I shall catch my death.” Sighing dramatically, Lacey tumbled onto the sofa. She opened her mouth to make some announcement but then her braid hit Hector and the two of them squealed. “So that’s where you have been! You rascal!”
Isla turned from her back to Margaret and gave her sister a small pinch. “Stop giggling. I see that look in your face.”
“What? I can’t help it if Lacey is funny.”
“She’s hoping a fever ravages me into an early grave. What would you do then?”
Margaret snickered. “I suppose she would marry the duke so all would be well, wouldn’t it?”
That was the end of any serious conversation that afternoon with her sisters. Isla roped Margaret into leaving the window seat and to play stage actors with Lacey, reenacting scenes from Shakespeare’s works until it was time for supper.
The time together was a lovely distraction for Isla. She slept easier that night, much better than the last two evenings since she’d learned the truth from Ronan.
But morning still came. Her mother accepted a delivery of a new dress for Isla––it must have been Ronan still making amends as promised––and while the cut wasn’t her favorite, the color and ribbons were absolutely stunning. Isla might have enjoyed it if she wasn’t worrying about how to manage her next conversation with the duke.
I cannot believe what I am doing. To think about turning down this engagement… What right do I have to that? It’s my own fault to be in this situation. And yet to hide the truth of Oliver’s parentage to himself for all his life? To hide away another woman?
Isla felt sick to her stomach as she prepared for a supper party that Ronan would be taking her to that evening. Part of her hoped he might not appear.
Except that he did. Promptly on the hour, he was at the door.
“You look very lovely, Lady Isla,” Ronan said to her with her mother hovering close behind. “I’m glad to see you in the gown.”
“How could I resist such a generous gift? Highly inappropriate,” she added before she could help herself, “since we are not yet wed. But I do love the green.”
His lips twitched as he held out an arm to her. “I am glad we are in agreement. Shall we?”
Swallowing hard, Isla permitted him to take her up to the carriage. She fully expected him to regale her with more excuses about his plan for Oliver once they were rolling down the avenue. But he said nothing. The man passed a thoughtful glance over her and then turned away to the window.
Now she was only more confused.
