"I, uh, well, I planned this better in my head, but I've been thinking about it for a while. Especially while with Mrs. Debicki today. Daisy, I know we haven't seen each other in person yet, but?—"
"I'm in love with you, Gatsby." My heart hammered in my ears. Was I being delusional? Was he going to say something else, and I just made a fool of myself? Had I mistaken his friendship for something more?
Was I just some teenage girl with a stupid crush?
With each second that passed, my anxiety grew. Why wasn't he speaking?
"Hello?" I called into the phone, now mortified that I'd just said something so utterly insane to him. "Hello?" My voice cracked as I called again. I pulled the phone from my face, and that was when I realized the phone had died.
What a cliffhanger.
I got up, putting the phone on the charger, and went to bed. I couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned all night, wondering what Gatsby had been trying to say, and if he'd heard what I said before my phone had died. I had to sit through the entire day, school, dance practice, meals, all of it, anxious and worried that I'd lost my only friend in the whole world, just because I too, like the original Gatsby, had built someone up in my head that wasn't real.
And as I lay in bed that evening, holding the phone to my chest, hoping he'd call, I realized he was right. Just last night, I'd agreed with Gatsby on his theory on the real Daisy versus a false one. I was an optimist then, thinking the boy on the other line liked me. But as nine pm passed,and there was no phone call, I was falling into a pessimistic state.
Was I Gatsby, having fallen for a Daisy that didn't exist?
I was ready to accept the loss of my friendship when at 9:03, the sharp ring caused me to bolt straight up and scramble to answer the phone.
"Hello?" I yelled into it.
"Hey, Daisy? You okay? The phone cut off last night and I couldn't get through to call back."
"Yeah, it died. You're late." I laughed lightly, trying not to sound obsessive.
"I know, sorry about that. Mrs. Debicki needed me again, so I got home late and I like to shower before talking to you."
"No worries," I lied, trying to play aloof. "Now, where were we? We were discussing Jordan and Nick being interested in each other, versus the theory that both characters were gay."
"Yes, but can we circle back to what we were talking about right before you got cut off?"
I pressed my lips together tightly. Had he heard?
"I mean, sure. Do you remember?" I tried to pretend as if I couldn't, but I was a terrible actress.
"Yeah. You had said, ‘I’m in love with you, Gatsby.'"
A nervous giggle slipped from my lips. "Oh, right. I was just kidding."
"Were you?" His voice shifted.
"I mean, yeah." I blew air out of my mouth. "That's wild, since we've never even met, am I right?"
"I don't think so."
The air in the room thickened.
"I think you know me better than anyone, and that I live for our nightly calls. I think that sometimes it's the only thing keeping me going. You're on my mind always, and Ijust need to say it before we talk about anything else tonight. I don't love Daisy."
My heart stopped. My mind went blank.
What? He'd just said a million nice, beautiful things about me, and then... he doesn't love me?
"I love Shiloh."
My heart restarted, slowly, but it was there.
"What?" I whispered.
