Tears stung my eyes, and I had to turn my back on her.
"Fuck you."
I sat for almost a decade with my guilt over what had been done to me. She was right. I'd never said the word no to any of the women my mother sent to me.
“Is this where the others went? I’ve heard about them. Erica was the only one they found.”
I looked up from the floor and smirked.
“She’s the only one I let be found.”
Donna’s face paled, and then grew red with rage.
"I remember the first time we did it. I took your virginity; I'm pretty sure. You came so fast." She cackled loudly from behind me. "One, two, three, little pumps and you came everywhere. We all laughed about it at lunch the next day."
My vision turned crimson, my mind blank, as I lifted theknife and swung around. It arced over my head, then plunged into her thigh. She screamed, then sobbed.
"I'm sorry! Please, don't kill me, Emile. We were just lonely, and it was fun. You had fun, didn't you?"
"You're sick. Is this how you justify what you did to me? By telling yourself I wanted it? That I enjoyed it?" I pulled the knife out and the gaping hole bled profusely.
"How did they let you out? You're the sick one," she spat. Sweat poured from her head. She fought the rope tied around her in my tattoo chair. The chair rattled with the exertion. I stepped back to stare at the scene in front of me. In prison, I'd crafted a plan for each and every one of them, but now that I was out, and had the first one in my chair, none of it felt right. I had to pivot.
I had to keep her alive.
I dropped the knife, stormed to the door, and turned off the light as I left. I hurried to grab towels, then stopped in the kitchen.
"Jules!" I shouted. "New plan!"
He popped up from somewhere, his eyebrows raised.
"Yes, sir?"
"She's going to be alive."
"Alive?" His mouth fell open and his eyes widened. "Are you sure?"
"Yes," I replied curtly, hurrying back to my room. I paused at a window, staring at the green light on my dock, and the one on hers. I was still so far away from my Daisy. I continued back to my tattoo room to bandage Donna Verger.
All in good time, I reminded myself. I couldn't go get my Daisy until I'd shed all of Emile. And I'd just started. Donna was just one of what would be many. I turned the light back on and she began to scream again.
"You won't get away with this. My husband will findyou. You're just a kid. He's twice your size and will kill you faster than you can breathe. He's a sniper."
"Sure, sure. Whatever you say," I muttered as I made a rough tourniquet around her thigh. “All of your friends said the same thing.” I added with a cackle.
"What was the point of this?" She squirmed. I picked the knife off the floor and brought it to her arm. I pushed gently until a single bead of blood popped up. She winced, and I began to drag it down.
"I did this to myself every time one of you would leave. I had to be careful, picking places that no one would see right away. My thighs, my upper arms. I hoped one day I'd be so scarred up and ugly you guys wouldn't want me anymore. But none of you seemed to care. I was just a pretty face and hard cock to take. I didn't say no because you never asked for yes. You didn't care then, and I don't care now."
I'd prepared a hundred different speeches for this very moment. Not just for her, but for all of them. I needed them to know why they were in my chair. I needed them to fully grasp that their crimes had consequences.
That just because I was small, that I didn't speak out, that I was a man, didn't make me any less of a victim.
My knife went deeper, and when it reached her elbow, it hit bone. She was openly sobbing now, blubbering and pleading for mercy. It fell on deaf ears. I was long gone from this world. The only thing on my mind was the green light shining brightly on the dock across the lake.
I'm coming, Daisy. I just have some things to finish up.
"You raped me," I said, pulling the knife from her. "Say it."
