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I swing by an electronics store and buy a disposable phone. My third phone in a fucking week. Bella smashed that first one last weekend.
Jude said he suspected my phone was cloned. If so, someone has it, access to my texts and address book. Whoever it is also obviously has the ability to fake texts.
Jude is on the case. I make a call from the new phone to get my service on my existing phone suspended temporarily so whoever has access can’t keep getting calls and texts. I head to the laser tag place.
Why would anyone want me to think Carly is fucking me over?
Who the fuck has been listening to my calls and reading texts, and for how long? It had to have happened sometime after Sunday, because that’s when I got the new phone.
My mind wanders back to my conversation with my Dad the night before.
He likes her for me. Whoever heard that doesn’t like that. I don’t know why.
But, fuck, I’m kind of relieved that she isn’t fucking me over. Why, I don’t know, maybe because it means I can still fuck her, where a few hours ago I could only maybe hate-fuck her.
She’s not gonna wanna touch me with a ten-foot pole now. In fact, she’s probably gonna try to get revenge on me for this afternoon. Unless I explain.
And now I don’t wanna hate-fuck, though she might wanna do that to me. I smile. I could dig that.
I shake it off. I’ve got to deal with this thing for work, talk to my brother. Figure shit out.
Then, figure out how to fuck her.
This weekend: find out who my biological father is and find a way to fuck my roommate. Interesting to-do list.
I get to the laser place and see her at a table with Austin, Ally, the girl from our Manila call center, Stacy, Bill the IT asshole who is staring at Carly’s tits, and some chick from accounting that has a crush on me. I can’t remember her name. Peggy. Penny. Whatever.
I stop and speak to my father, first, who’s talking to Alice and Blake at the bar.
“A minute?”
25
CARLY
I’ve already had three alcoholic beverages in half an hour. I am mad. I am fighting mad.
Why on Earth did Aiden try to screw me over?
Hallelujah that it didn’t work, that it backfired in his stupid jerk face. It would be karmic justice if that lead turned into Carmichael Consulting International winning over Babylon away from their rival competitor, Franklin.
Justice. Him knowing he tried to fuck me over and it blew up in his face.
Although, them winning that account would mean more success for Carmichael and he’s a Carmichael so it’d probably mean he’d wind up buying a new Ducati or something. I looked that bike up and it’s a $250K motorcycle. It’s black and shiny gold and sexy as fuck. And why on earth does he need it? Doesn’t he know there are starving children in Africa? Who needs an extravagance like that?
So, really, I’m getting the shitty end of the deal and it makes my blood boil. He’s doing wrong to me, but he’s still getting the un-shitty end of the stick. Why does he get the sugar-coated stick and I get the shit stick?
I’m so mad I could throw something.
Mr. C starts talking. “Can I have everyone’s attention, please? We’re gonna go on ahead and start the game. Team building isn’t just about building the team up, teaching us how to better communicate, but also team building is about having fun with your team. Being competitive in a healthy way. And at CC, we also love having a laugh together. What better way to laugh than to shoot one another with fake guns in the dark, right? We all work hard. We deserve to play hard, too. In addition to the fun tonight, you’re all, every single one of you, getting bonuses. They’ll be in your usual accounts Monday. We’ve just had a great quarter. An amazing year-end. It’s because of the hard work all of you put in. Please, have fun tonight. And thank you. Thank all of you who either have contributed or who are now part of the team because we saw potential in you. Veteran employees here, you’re all getting twenty-five percent bonuses for your annual bonus. Every single one of you has earned it. Brand new employees, the seven of you who have started in the past while, Carly, Ally, Meryl, Bianca, Helder, Jennifer, and Nathaniel, you each get a month’s salary for this bonus, so you don’t feel left out and so you see what working at CC is all about. We reward for results. I hand you all over to Melissa, here now, who will explain the rules for laser tag. Grab a vest.”
Everyone claps. I am stunned. There’s going to be over $7K in my account Monday. More than enough to pay my Visa off.
And I get paid again next Friday.
And I have a company credit card.
And, my article went viral today.
