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Robert catches me in his arms just before I hit the floor.

Interlude IV – Robert

May 2005.

I’ve decided to quit school.

I haven’t told anyone this, not even Mum, but Mr. Brennan cornered me in an empty hallway after my swimming practice last week and pushed me hard into the concrete. He then proceeded to tell me, in no uncertain terms, that if I didn’t do as he said he’d make life very difficult for me. Hah! As if he wasn’t already doing that.

I never got the chance to find out what he was going to tell me to do – because I kicked the living crap out of him.

He’s been taking sick days ever since, but it seems he hasn’t breathed a word to anyone the reason for his absence. I guess he’s too scared I’ll go to the principal and let him know how he’d gotten a bit…handsy. I hope he’s really suffering, the bastard.

My and Sasha’s eighteenth birthday is coming up this weekend. This whole thing with Mr. Brennan has kind of taken the joy out of it, though. Dad’s actually coming over this time, which only happens every second or third birthday. He’s rented out the local GAA clubhouse and is throwing a big party for us and all our friends.

Mum’s distressed as ever after I announced that I was leaving school. I expected Dad to be just as pissed about it, but surprisingly he wasn’t. He told Mum that I was an adult now, and that I should be allowed to make my own decisions. He’s irritated because Mum’s dating some new bloke, and he wants to get one over on her. I’m not complaining, obviously, since it’s working out to my advantage.

It’s been an awful week. I came home after the incident with Mr. Brennan, my knuckles red, raw, and bleeding because I’d punched him so hard, and cried for hours. Cried like a little kid. The only person I’d wanted to comfort me during those dark hours was Lana, yet she was tucked up safe in her bed, completely unaware of how much I needed her.

Dad said that since I’m turning eighteen I can move over to London and work for him at the agency. The idea feels like a breath of fresh air, like freedom, because I need to get away from the suffocation of this village. Away from school and nut jobs like Mr. Brennan, and away from my house where I have to see Lana constantly and try not to touch her. Try not to hurt her, but I always do anyway.

Last year I made the discovery that my sister likes girls, and now I’m coming to think that she might actually be crushing on her best friend. I can’t believe I never noticed it before, how she always defends Lana against me, so very protective of her. Not to mention how she checks out her arse when Lana’s not looking.

What a pair we are, twin brother and sister in love with the same girl.

Well, I’m not sure if Sasha’s affections run as deep as love, but mine certainly do. Anyway, it makes me feel even worse, because now it’s like I’m harbouring a secret attraction for my sister’s girl.

I’ve been going around with bandages on my hands, pretending I cut myself by falling over some rocks at the beach. I’m shocked everyone believes the story, since I’m cut in the exact same places on each hand. Tonight is the party. I unwrap the bandages and find that the cuts have healed enough to leave them uncovered.

Dad’s been staying at a hotel and said he’ll meet us at the clubhouse, though I think he’s reluctant to come since he knows Mum will be there with her new boyfriend. Not to mention Lana’s mother will be attending, and he’s never gotten along with her. To be honest, I think he might be a little scared of her. The woman’s built like a brick shithouse; it’s a wonder where Lana got her small, feminine frame from.

I meet up with Dean and Liam before going to the party, arriving fashionably late. Sasha’s already there, surrounded by her friends from school. Lana’s sitting beside her wearing a cute red dress, her pale, perfect skin all on show. She got her braces taken out a couple of months back, and now every time I see her smile or laugh at one of Sasha’s jokes she looks even prettier than she did before.

My jaw instinctively tightens when I notice Ronan’s here, too. Sasha must have invited him. God, I hate that little shit, always sucking up to Lana, never leaving her side. When the guys from my class see me enter, they all start whooping and cheering. Then Dad’s in my face, leading me over to the bar, going on about buying me my first legal drink.

After that things become blurry. People keep setting fresh drinks down in front of me, and I keep knocking them back. The “Happy Birthday” song is sung, with boys and girls lining up to give me and Sasha our eighteen kisses. I laugh bitterly to myself, thinking how Sasha would probably much prefer to be getting kisses from my line. Furthermore, the only girl I want a kiss from is Lana, but I saw her scurry away to the bathroom before she could get roped into it.

Later on, I’m vaguely aware of Mum and Dad having a big fight and Mum storming out of the clubhouse, her boyfriend in tow, who, by the way, I don’t think is going to last the week. Lana’s mother gives Dad a look of pure disgust before marching out after Mum.

Soon most of the parents are gone, and I’m well on my way to passing out in one of the booths. A couple of girls approach me, but I seriously have no interest. All I can do is stare at Lana messing around and dancing all nerdy with Ronan. I fall asleep with my head on the table for at least a half an hour, and when I wake up I feel like I’ve sobered a little.

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