I swallowed. “That’s what scares me. I don’t want to wake up a year from now somewhere else, playing good rugby, and realize I left the right thing behind.”
He leaned forward again. “Here’s the part people won’t tell you... Hell, I shouldn’t be telling you this,” he said. “Ireland will still be there. European rugby isn’t disappearing. But the life you’re building now? The role you have here? That only exists in this window.”
I nodded slowly, the tightness in my chest shifting.
“You don’t have to decide today.” He continued. “But don’t let other people’s definitions of success rush you into a version of your career that doesn’t fit anymore. If you stay, make it a choice. If you go, make it a choice. Just don’t drift into it because it looks good on paper.”
I stood a few minutes later, calmer than when I’d walked in, even if the answer was still out of reach. At the door, I paused.
“Thanks,” I said quietly.
Knox gave me a small, knowing smile. “That’s what I’m here for, Connor. Rugby will always ask for more. The trick is deciding what you’re willing to give—and what you’re not.”
15
Teddy
By the time training wrapped, my shirt clung to my spine and my brain felt like it had done twice the work my legs had. I’d been distracted the entire session, and pretending otherwise had only worn me down further.
It didn’t help that every time I caught a glimpse of Connor, still talking to Coach Emery like he belonged onourside of the pitch, my stomach had bottomed out and I lost focus.
“Teddy!” Coach Em called out, her voice carrying across the pitch. “With me for a second.”
I jogged over, towel slung around my neck, pulse finally settling. That lasted all of two seconds, because Connor was still beside her, arms folded loosely across his chest, expression unreadable.
Coach Em didn’t waste time. “Friday night, you and O’Riley are attending the league’s investor dinner.”
I blinked. “I’m sorry, the what?”
“The investor dinner,” she repeated, as if I’d misheard. “All major club investors will be there. The board wants bothcaptains present to represent their teams. Coach Knox and I will be there too.”
I stared at her, then at him, then very deliberately at the grass because breathing suddenly felt like work.
“What’s the dress code?”
“Formal.”
Of course it was. These things always were.
“I can pick you up,” Connor offered, and my eyes snapped to him.
“I can make my own way there,” I said, sharper than I meant to. God, why did he make me so defensive? Was it habit? Like muscle memory from years of pushing against him? Or was it something I really didn’t want to examine yet?
His gaze held mine. “I’d like us to arrive together. Show a united front. And it’ll make the night easier on both of us.”
That made sense, and since I wasn’t great at being the show pony, having someone I knew there would be good, even if it was Connor.
“Will there be press there?” I asked. It was something I wasn’t sure I could handle, especially being with him again. It’d start a whole other fire.
“Probably,” Connor said honestly. “But I know that these events have a few trusted press outlets only. It’s not a frenzy. Investors have little interest in social media posting too if you’re worried about that.”
I wanted to ask him outright if he was the reason the Buzz post had gone quiet. Comments had been turned off, and secondary posts weren’t popping up in my DMs anymore. I don’t know how, or why, but I believed him when he said he’d take care of it.
A part of me also believed I’d be able to get through the night with him, probably with a few bickering moments between us, but we’d survive.
“Alright,” I said, nodding once. “If that’s what works best, then sure.”
His shoulders deflated slightly.
