Then she twists the plastic around her hand and starts to lift.
“What the fuck are you doing?” I growl as I lurch forward to catch the top before it can open and spew contents everywhere again.
She jumps, her angry eyes hitting mine as she tightens her grip on the bag. “What are you doing?”
“Christ,” I growl. “That bag must weigh as much as you do.”
“It’s fine.”
“Fine has you struggling to lift it?”
She rolls her eyes. “This is my job. Sometimes I cook. Sometimes I take out the trash. Sometimes it’s heavy. Sometimes it isn’t.”
This woman is infuriating.
Mostly because she’s right.
“Fine,” I snap. “But I’m here now, so I’ll take care of it.” Only when I try to tug the bag out of her hold, she just grips it tighter.
“I said, I’ve got it!”
I look up at the sky, count to ten, and release the bag.
And when she doesn’t make it into the dumpster a-fucking-gain, I snatch it away from her, tying the top so it won’t spill.
She snatches it back.
I reach over. “Just let me help you!”
“No!” she shouts, yanking at the bag so hard I let go, lest it fucking tear in half. “Why are you being so fucking stubborn?”
“I’m the stubborn one?”
She glares. “I told you I have this, and you’re fucking butting in again. So yeah.” A beat. “Stubborn.”
I throw up my hands. “I don’t understand why you won’t just let me help?—”
“Because I don’t need your help!” she shouts again. “Okay, Leo? I fucking don’t. Not with this. Not with anything.”
“Why the hell not?”
Her chin comes up. “Because I can do it on my own.”
“Except, I’m here now and I can easily throw a fucking bag in a fucking dumpster?—”
“Yeah, you’re here now!” she snaps. “But for how long? Because if I get used to you—” Her voice falters for a heartbeat then her chin lifts, her spine goes ramrod straight. “I can do this by myself.”
“But you don’t have to do it alone.”
She looks away and when her words come, they’re quiet…and heartbreaking. “If I get used to it, I’ll want it. And then when you leave next time, it’s going to hurt even more.”
My knees nearly buckle as I finally get it, as I see finally understand how deeply I’ve wounded her, as I see what’s truly beneath the anger in her words, her eyes.
Hurt.
She’s fucking hurting.
Because of me.
