I look for Hazel, seeing her and Monroe playing with Lake. “We needed to be around family. My mom remarried… again. She sold the house, moved in with her new husband, and now they travel everywhere all the time. Plus…”
I don’t really want to give him the last reason, which was probably the biggest one. Hazel had friends back in Philly, I had friends, but it was becoming apparent that Hazel was looking for something we couldn’t have there. I wasn’t ready to date at the time, but she needs a father figure in her life. It’s the only reason that makes sense why I would put myself in the situation we’re in.
“Sure, my dad would come for weeks during the offseason and stuff, but honestly, it needs to be more consistent.” I shrug, and he doesn’t say anything. “Maybe I have it wrong, but she was starting to ask questions, notice that our family looks different than some of her friends. I started panicking, plus I think it’s good for her to have a male influence in her life. Someone who loves her as much as my dad does. And since I didn’t want to date, there wasn’t one coming into my life?—”
“But isn’t that what you’re doing now?”
My head whips in his direction.
He raises both hands. “Sorry, none of my business.” But his eyes never stray from mine.
“Hayes told you?”
He nods. “He didn’t want me to be blindsided.”
“And why would you be blindsided? What does he know?” I feel anger brewing inside me, wishing I could be indifferent to us.
“Give me a break, Penelope. Everyone knows something’s up as soon as you and I are in the same room together. And relax, he doesn’t know the specifics. My assumption is that Callie is the only one who really knows anything. Foster told her.”
I swallow hard. “Well, if you have to know, it’s time. I’m not looking for a father for her…” Lies, but not complete lies. “I want someone to share my life with… I want more kids. I want Hazel to have siblings, and I’m tired of doing it all by myself. And since there’s no DoorDash for husbands, I have to put myself through the pain and torture of modern dating.”
He says nothing, and the longer silence goes on, the hotter my temper gets. He always ignores what’s between us, even if ignoring it is what’s best. But I’m not in the mood to fight him either.
One raindrop hits the top of my head, then one gets me in the eye. That’s the only warning we get before the skies open.
Leighton screams behind me, and I turn around. Hayes swoops her up and runs toward the pavilion with Lincoln running at their side.
Decker’s hand slides into mine, then we’re running. I’m trying to keep up with his long strides while ignoring the warmth of his hand wrapped around mine.
He leads us under a building overhang, pushing my back to the brick wall. My hair is drenched and sticking to my face, my clothes soaked. Decker shakes the water from his hair and looks at the riverbank. There aren’t any more orange vests.
“Hazel.” I look around him, searching for her.
“She’s fine.” Decker points toward the pavilion where her and Monroe are secure with Lake and some other families.
I glance at Decker. He’s looking at the river, hands in the front pocket of his hoodie, rain still dripping from his hair. He seems completely unbothered by the fact that we’re standing so close under an overhang that feels like the size of a postage stamp.
“You warm enough?” He sheds his hoodie. “It’s wet but will warm you a little.”
“You’ll freeze.”
He wraps it around my shoulders, and I slide my arms through. “I’m warm-blooded, remember?”
My eyes lift to his, those brown eyes I stared into so many times and thought I saw my future. But sadly, those dreams never came true.
“Penelope.” His voice is rough like gravel as he pushes away the wet strands of my hair from my face.
Our eyes stay locked. Why can’t someone cut this tension between us, this thread between us? Set me free from him. But with the rain dropping into puddles on the ground around us, I’m brought right back to a memory of when I thought maybe it really was our time.
Chapter
Twenty-Four
Penelope
* * *
It rained the night my car wouldn’t start. I was stranded at the drugstore, and my dad was away at a conference in New York.
