And I trust you with my life.”
Ooh.
The thought sent a thrill through him, but disappointment followed soon after. He knew what that meant.
“So no relieving tension?”
At least Daryl looked as pained as Jason felt. “I can’t risk it. I’m sorry.”
Jason knew he meant it. But if they both liked each other, trusted each other, and found each other attractive, what was so bad about letting fate take its course? They might not be right for each other, but if they were, the end result would be glorious. He’d tried not to imagine it, but now the thought of him and Daryl together, bonded, was stuck in his brain.
And he wanted it.
“Can I ask why?”
Daryl’s smile disappeared, and even from across the room, Jason felt him tense. “Why what?”
“Why you’re not prepared to risk it. Would a bond with me really be so bad?”
“Yes!” He spat the word, and Jason reeled back as though slapped. “Fuck.” He gently banged his head against the bathroom door. “It’s not you, Jason, it’s me.”
He couldn’t help the bark of laughter that burst out of him. “Really?”
“I’m serious. I could never bond with anyone. I don’t want to.”
“Ever?”
“No.”
He made it sound so final, like that was the end of the conversation, but Jason burned with curiosity. “But you’ve seen how happy your friends are, how in love they are.”
“And like I said before, I’m happy for them. But it’s not for me. Maybe you’ve only seen the good side of a bond, but I’ve seen the destruction and heartache it can cause.” His eyes screwed shut, as though warding off the pain. “I don’t want anything to do with them. I’m sorry, but that’s the way I feel.”
He’d pushed too much already, the tense set to Daryl’s shoulders told him that, and although he was desperate to know what Daryl had seen, he let the subject drop. “Okay.”
Standing, he walked over to Daryl and stopped in front of him. “I won’t bring it up again.” He wanted to wrap him up in his arms and take away the pain so obvious in his eyes. But instead, he settled for resting his hand at the base of his throat, just for a moment. “I’m sorry for whatever happened to make you feel this way, and I’m sorry for trying to coax you into doing something you don’t want to.”
To Jason’s surprise, Daryl’s hand closed briefly over his, then removed Jason’s fingers from his throat and let his hand drop.
“I want to,” he whispered, voice laced with sadness. “I just can’t.” He gave Jason another
heated look, then turned into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.
Well, fuck.
Jason closed his eyes, feelings all messed up.
Frustration welled up inside him, and he reached down to palm his cock, now fully hard and straining against his jeans. But underneath it all lay a heavy sadness for whatever had hurt Daryl so badly he hated even the idea of a potential bond, let alone a full connection. He placed his hand on the door, fingers splayed, imagining Daryl doing the same thing, then rolled his eyes at himself for being ridiculous.
Whatever he thought might happen between them wasn’t going to. He needed to get used to that and move on. Accepting it was for the best might be hard while they shared such a small space, but rationally he knew it was the right thing to do. If they somehow triggered a potential bond, and Daryl refused to complete it, that would hurt so much more than a rejection now.
He walked over to his bed and collapsed back on it to stare up at the ceiling. Hopefully the council didn’t have any more tasks like this in store for him and Daryl. The sexual tension would be the end of him.
THE PRECISE TIME of the full moon would be 19:52 Monday evening. There’d been no tasks on Monday in preparation for it, and there’d be none the day after while they recovered.
With sunset at half-past four, it’d be almost fully dark by five thirty.
At ten past five, members of the council arrived at the lodge. Everyone was already gathered in the living area, tension crackling in the air like lightning might strike any moment. Jason felt it under his skin, running through his veins, and he tapped his fingers, leg bouncing with the need to get moving.
