CHAPTER ELEVEN
Daryl took his time retrieving clean clothes from his bag. He wanted to organise his thoughts before they had thistalk.
Sentences like that always left him on edge. Why say they had to have a talk? Why not just do it?
It was the build-up to it that unnerved him. If Jason had just said what he needed to say, then none of this nervous anticipation would be running through his veins right now.
Feeling Jason’s eyes on him, he turned around as he zipped his jeans up, smirking when he caught Jason’s gaze fixed on his arse. Eyebrow raised, he gestured to where Jason still sat propped up in bed, bare-chested, and as far as Daryl was aware, very naked underneath. “Aren’t you gonna get dressed?”
“What?” Jason looked up, startled as though his mind had been elsewhere. He glanced down at himself. “Oh, yeah. Sorry.” He let out a soft laugh. “Apparently I can only concentrate on one thing at a time.”
Daryl frowned but didn’t ask him to elaborate. He sat on his bed, leaning back on his hands, and watched unashamedly as Jason pushed the covers back and stood.
He was hard—cock jutting out in front of him—and Daryl’s mouth fell open. He’d not been expecting that.
The full moon might’ve played a part in what happened Monday night, but the lunar pull had lessened since then, and the wave of desire sweeping through him at the sight of Jason’s obvious arousal seemed to increase in its intensity.
He was on his feet before he registered his body moving. “Do we have to talk?” He trailed a finger over Jason’s hip, lips curving up at the resulting shiver. “I like you, you like me. There seems to be no danger of a bond happening, and everyone who needs to know knows. Why make this complicated?”
Jason visibly swallowed as he turned to face Daryl. Usually an open book, Daryl struggled to read him this time. “I like to know the expectations of every relationship I enter into.” He shrugged.
“Helps minimise the hurt later on.”
Out of his depth—relationships weren’t something Daryl made a habit of—Daryl took a step back, but Jason was quick to grab his wrist, halting his retreat.
“Don’t do that. Don’t back away when the conversation makes you uncomfortable.”
“I’m not uncomfortable,” he muttered to the floor, and Jason laughed.
“No, of course not.” He ran his thumb back and forth over the inside of Daryl’s wrist, soothing, like he was calming a skittish animal.
Daryl sighed and scratched the back of his head. “I don’t do relationships.”
“Ever?”
“No.” Daryl shook his head. “The pack is all the family I need, and sex is just sex. We both go into it knowing nothing comes after, there’s never any need to manage expectations.”
Jason stared at him open-mouthed.
“What?” Daryl fidgeted with his belt buckle, not enjoying Jason’s scrutiny.
“Don’t you ever want more?”
As if summoned, he pictured the looks his parents used to give each other near the end. His mother’s full of guilt and frustration, his father’s hurt and regret. “No.” He had people that he loved in his life; he didn’t need anything else.
Jason looked less than convinced; Daryl didn’t feel inclined to clarify his feelings.
“Isn’t that how Alec used to feel?”
“Maybe,” he conceded. For a long time, he and Alec had had a lot in common: no relationships and a dislike of bonds. But their reasons were vastly different. “Alec was driven by guilt. Guilt for something that wasn’t his fault,” he added. Things had changed for Alec. He and Nathan had finally cleared the air, alleviating the weight on Alec’s shoulders, and he’d let Mark in. Bonds hadn’t been at the root of his issues; it was the fear of losing someone again, of letting them down. Once he resolved that, the rest slotted into place.
And good for him. Daryl loved Alec like a brother, seeing him as happy as he was now made him smile.
“I’m not Alec. Our reasons aren’t the same.”
“What are yours, then? Why are you so against the possibility of finding someone who’ll be with you forever?”
Daryl rolled his shoulders. He was so done talking about this. A quick glance down showed him Jason’s erection had faded. Unsurprising given their topic of conversation.
