Me too.
It took everything he had not to collapse into Nick’s familiar embrace and just tell him everything. Instead he managed a muttered, “Thank you,” and held on for a bit longer, wondering all the while if Nick could tell he was different now.
When Nick patted him on the back with a muffled, “Can’t breathe,” Cole immediately let go and took a step back.
“Sorry.”
Nick offered him a sad smile. “I guess it takes some getting used to.”
Well, that answered one question.
“Yeah.” Cole didn’t say anything else. Now wasn’t the time. After accepting condolences from Nick’s parent’s, Cole finally found his brother and sister inside. He felt eyes on him as he walked towards them, hushed whispers that were clear as a bell with his enhanced hearing. Cole ignored them all.
Cath stood as soon as she spotted him, eyes red-rimmed and glassy, and Cole’s chest tightened. His mum had assured him that they’d understand this wasn’t real, that they’d realise what had happened, but looking at their distraught faces now, Cole wasn’t so sure.
Cath all but threw herself into his arms, clutching him like a lifeline, and Cole wrapped her up, careful to keep his hold loose though.
“I’m so glad you’re here.” She pulled back a bit to meet his eyes. “We weren’t sure...” Her gaze drifted to the back of the room, and Cole didn’t need to turn to know she’d spotted the other members of his pack.
Pack.
It still felt strange to say it, even in his head.
Crushing him in another hug, Cath brushed his ear with a kiss, her voice barely audible as she whispered. “We know.”
Those two words were all he needed to hear.
They knew.
The vice around his heart eased enough to let him breathe properly, and he gave his sister one last squeeze before letting go. When she looked at him this time, her expression was still that of a grief-stricken daughter, but Cole also saw the flash of understanding.
Thank fuck.
He hadn’t realised how hard it was going to be until he’d seen them. If they’d thought this was real, that their parents were really dead, Cole didn’t think he’d have been able to look them in the eye and keep up the pretence. His family must have talked about this a lot without his knowledge, planned how they would act, because to the onlooker, both his siblings appeared as upset as he’d expect them to be.
One glance over his shoulder told him none of his fellow shifters had heard Cath’s words. Aaron and Logan stood at the back, but neither looked Cole’s way. Smith and Rich were nowhere to be seen, which suited him just fine.
He hugged his brother just as hard before they all took their seats as the service began, and Cole held his sister’s hand as the vicar talked about his parents and the life they’d lead up until the accident.
As funerals went, it was lovely. Cole listened to the vicar tell stories—obviously provided by Cath and Mark that he’d totally forgotten about. There was laughter in amongst the tears, and by the time the curtain closed around the two coffins, Cole felt oddly at peace.
It wasn’t his parents inside them, but it was a closure of sorts. He might not get to see them for a very long time, if ever. But he was okay with that because they were safe.
The gathering at the local pub afterwards wasn’t so easy to navigate.
While his immediate family were aware this was fake, the rest of his parents’ relatives had no idea. Their grief was real.
And awful to witness.
With every condolence he accepted, a part of him broke inside. These people loved and trusted him, their worry for him was genuine, and Cole stood there and lied to their faces. The worst thing was that he was leaving all this behind. His last memory of family and friends would be a day filled with sadness and deceit because fuck knew when he’d get to see any of them again.
* * *
By the timeCole climbed back in the car at the end of the day, he was exhausted.
The journey back was quiet, a silence settling inside the car for which Cole was grateful this time. Resting his head against the glass, he closed his eyes, trying to centre himself for what was to come.
From here on out, there’d be no reprieve from training. With the funeral out of the way, Cole’s time would be spent learning to be a member of the McKillan pack and everything that entailed.
As they pulled up in front of the huge building Cole grudgingly called home now, Rich twisted around in his seat to face him. “Training starts at ten tomorrow.”
Logan answered for him. “We’ll be there.”
