I can’t breathe. I’msuffocating. He was looking for me? Of course he was looking for me.
I dial Cole.
“Hey babe, what's up?”
“Cole. I need you to pick Rune up from the baseball fields. Right now. I’m freaking out, and I need…I don’t fucking know, but I need to be alone. Can you come get him, please?”
The panic in her voice is clear. “Are you okay? Yeah, I’m on my way, but LJ, talk to me.”
I hear her keys rattling. Then her door shut. Then her car start. Once I know she is coming, I lose it.
“Cole, I—I don’t—I don’t…" I can’t even form a sentence. “Just… I’ll see you soon.”
I hang up.
I open the third letter.
January 22, 2018
Two years, pretty bird.
I miss you.
Every fucking day, I miss you.
What did I do?
I’m losing hope that I will ever find you.
My life is dull, my light gone.
Ski still says you haven’t contacted him.
I’m sittinghere now at Mill’s, watching him make us both Leos.
Nothing is the same without you.
Are you alive?
Are you okay?
Did you move on?
Do you love someone else?
No, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know.
But I still look. Every day, Gage is searching. I am searching.
My heart races every time I see a mess of dark curls walking down the street.
But it’s not you.
Never you.
I love you.
– Ev
