The same distressing upswell of emotion that made her cry earlier in the field tried to push up her throat again, so she looked away and out the window for a moment to get herself under control. She didn’t know what to do with their words. She’d never been loved before. Not by anyone besides her mom and Tavia, anyway. And her dad, of course, but look how that had turned out.
Not the time for that.
How did she feel about them? But that caused another wave of upswell to upset her, and she spoke without looking at them, a hint of panic in her voice.
“But… that’s the problem! How… how could I ever choose between you? I’d never do that to any of you. You guys belong together. I’d just get in the way.”
She heard two clicks, two sets of thumps as knees hit the carpeted floor, and then her head jerked around as two new sets of hands touched hers over Chad’s. She looked at the hands—two brown, two white, one tan—holding hers, then looked up at their dear faces. Faces she could see. Faces she already knew as well as she’d known their Horseman voices.
Aaron smiled gently at her. “Remember what we said Della promised us if we brought her the Horseman’s head?”
She shook her head. A few too many things had happened since then.
Chad leaned closer, his breath warm against her ear. “She promised we’d all be hers. All of us.”
She shivered and closed her eyes.
“What kind of losers would we be if we didn’t offer the woman we actually love the same thing we so stupidly offered the girl we had a passing fancy for?” Jerome asked, a grin in his Keith David voice.
She didn’t have to see him to know. She knew the sound of a smile in his velvety-smooth voice by now.
Chad’s breath against her ear made her shiver again. “I’ll pay for your school so you don’t have to work so hard.”
She shook her head, eyes closed tight. “I don’t want that.”
Aaron tightened his fingers on hers. “I’ll buy you a house with my first stock market paycheck.”
She huffed. “Not a chance. You’re spending that on your poor mama. Your grandma, now,Aiden.”
Jerome leaned up until his lips just almost brushed hers. “I’ll get you out of all the speeding tickets you get in the fancy new car Chad buys you.”
She opened her eyes but didn’t pull away. His amber eyes were mesmerizing from this close, practically golden with dark rims.
“I don’t want a new car. I don’t want a house. I don’t want money.”
Chad’s breath teased her ear again. “What do you want, Esmie? We’ll do anything for you. You’ve done everything for us. Let us do something for you.”
Closing her eyes once again, she took a deep breath, then leaned that little breath forward and kissed Jerome. He hmmed softly against her lips, one hand coming up to cup her head gently. The tip of Chad’s nose lightly touched the sensitive skin just in front of her ear, tickling the little hairs there. Aaron let go with one hand to clasp her knee, sighing with relief.
She kissed him next, not opening her eyes. He was hesitant at first, kissing only lightly, but when she didn’t pull away, hefirmed his lips against hers. It was still chaste, just a kiss, a promise, sweet and simple.
Chad was last. His quiet strength seeped into her, and she felt any last reservations float away. Would she have some explaining to do with her mother and Tavia? Yes. Did she care? No. She’d find a way. She couldn’t choose between them. She couldn’t split them up.
This felt right. For the first time in a long time,shefelt right.
Then, the kiss was over, and she smiled without opening her eyes, leaning her forehead against his.
“You know what I want?”
He shook his head.
“I want to change my major.” She opened her eyes to see the surprise on his face. Sure enough, his blue eyes were wide. “Not gonna lie, holding that skull was hella gross. I don’t want to do that again if I can help it.”
He chuckled, his fingers closing over hers. All their fingers closed over hers.
“So what do you want to do?”
“I think I want to be a history major.”
