The bookstore is silent now. The barista is cleaning the espresso machine. The lights are soft, golden. Outside, snow is falling in slow, heavy flakes.
“Can I show you something?” I ask.
She hesitates, then nods.
I pull a galley copy ofAngel’s Shareout of my bag. I flip to the dedication page, and hand it to her.
She reads.
For K.V., who is not an angel, but made me believe I could be something better than the devil.
Her eyes go wide. She looks up at me, and I see the old fire there, the spark I thought I’d extinguished.
I take a breath, then say: “I know I don’t deserve you. I know you could burn this place down and walk away smiling. But I want you to know I’m trying. I’m going to keep trying. For as long as you’ll let me.”
She closes the book, presses it to her chest. For a second, she says nothing.
Then, softly: “You messed up, you know.”
I nod. “I know. Big time, and I’m sorry about that.”
She lets out a breath, slow, measured. “But you wrote three hundred pages as a homage to us. To our time together.”
I smile. “I couldn’t help it. And I have three hundred more, if you’ll let me”
She takes a step closer, until we’re just inches apart. I can feel her heat, see the pulse in her neck.
“Buy me a coffee,” she says.
I blink. “Now? It’s almost eight.”
“Now, Talon.”
I nod, and for the first time in months, I feel the ice in my chest start to melt.
We walk to the counter, side by side. She orders a black coffee. I get the same. We sit in the back corner, not touching, but close enough. The air is thick with the smell of old books and new beginnings.
For a long time, we just drink, not talking.
Then Kat says, “If you ever lie to me again, I don’t know what I’ll do, Talon. I just survived something that I thought I’d never survive. I came out the other end, and I’m not sure if I’m willing to go through that again.”
My heart drops, and I look down at the table.
“I’m sorry, Kat,” I repeat again. “It wasn’t my intention. I’ve always been bad with relationships, and being with you was astonishing. For the first time, I didn’t feel boxed in, even though we were living in close quarters. I felt like I was free, and could be who I wanted to be. There was a woman in my bed every night, and we connected not just physically, but emotionally too. It threw me for a loop, and when we had the big fight, I didn’t know how to react. I guess I don’t have muchpractice,” I say in a rueful tone. “Usually, I just go stone cold during fights, and then she leaves.”
Kat fixes me with this big blue eyes.
“That’s what happened with us. You were cruel, and I left. You did nothing.”
I nod.
“I know, but I realized almost immediately how I’d fucked up. That I never should have let you leave. I tried to contact you, but you wouldn’t reply, and for a while, I even thought I had the wrong number. We never tested it at the cabin, after all.”
The beautiful blonde shakes her head, her blue eyes flashing.
“No, never,” she says in a quiet voice. “But what now?”
I try to go to the humorous route.
