“It’s best that way,” he said. “I understand your reasons for what you did.Iwould have done the same. If I could, I would have taken your place.”
I scooted closer to him. “I know you would, but when Lucifer told me how he entered Hell, I knew I was the only one who could close the gateway.”
“Lucifertold you what to do?” he bit out.
“Yes.” I repeated to him what Lucifer had told me. “The whole reason he never tried to stop us from closing the gateway was because he knew you would never allow me to die.”
“He could have been lying to you aboutallof that.”
“He could have been, but when Angela arrived, I realized he wasn’t. I just didn’t know if my abilities would be strong enough to close the gateway, or if my sacrifice would be enough.”
Kobal released my hand to grip the wheel with both hands again. His claws lengthened and the veins in his arms stood starkly out. “Fuck,River!”
“Kobal…” When I reached for him, he captured my hand and held it in the air between us.
“When you were gone, when you weredead,there was this emptiness—” His hoarse words broke off.
I’d seen many emotions from Kobal, but never had I expected to see vulnerability. It shimmered in his eyes when they held mine. It radiated through the tremor in his hand before he steadied himself. That vulnerability, and the knowledge I’d been the one to inflict it on him, tore through my heart more effectively than Caim’s sword.
“I wish I hadn’t hurt you in such a way,” I whispered.
“It was necessary, but the chance you took without knowing if it would work…. You scared the shit out of me!” He focused on the pitted road again when we hit a bump that made it sound like the tires would fly off.
“I’m still here.”
“Only because of Raphael. If he hadn’t intervened, you wouldn’t be here.”
“Careful, you might say something nice about an angel,” I teased, hoping to coax a smile to his lips, but he remained solemn.
“Don’t ever kill yourself again,” he commanded.
“I have no intentions of making it a habit.” Still no smile from him. “Hopefully no one will create anymore unnatural gateways into Hell. If they do, it seems I’m going to be immortal one day and I’ll be able to shut gateways without dying for good, so there is that.”
“There is that.”
I moved closer until I leaned against his side. Resting my head on his chest, I relished the solid beat of his heart beneath my ear as he wrapped his arm around me. I could feel his lingering anger through the rigid set of his body, but he kissed my temple.
“Do you think Raphael is telling the truth about me becoming immortal?” I asked.
“I don’t see why he would lie about it.”
“Immortal,” I breathed. “It sounds too good to be true. Will I have to feed on wraiths like you, like Hawk now that he’s changed, and like the angels who left Heaven do?”
“I don’t think so. Hawk has become full demon, the angels fed on souls in Heaven, and adapted to feed on wraiths once they entered Hell. You were born like this. If the gateway hadn’t opened, you would have lived a normal, mortal life. Hawk’s genetic makeup was changed by blood and death, but in your case, the world has changed, not you.”
“What did the fallen angels feed on while they were on Earth? There were no wraiths on Earth before the gateway opened. Did they feed on ghosts?”
“I don’t know. You would have to ask Caim that.”
“Will the spirits of people who die and deserve to go to Hell still do so, or will they be stuck on Earth?”
“Both,” he said. “With the veil between Hell and Earth broken, they will be able to pass back and forth. With more free reign, they will most likely not be punished as severely as they once were, but there are seal creatures who will make up for the lack of demons in Hell. They will feed on the wraiths. Only solid things will be remain on one side of the gateway or the other.”
“Unless you open a gateway into Hell again?”
“Yes.”
“Could you open a gateway here, and one by my brothers that we could travel through to get to them?”
