He nodded and left.
“Make that fucker bleed for what he did,” Valon said, then left with Callum.
I sat there and poured a glass of whisky. The silence was deafening. It allowed my mind to think about things I didn’t want to.
Aria.
Always Aria.
Hayden shifted in his chair. I’d almost forgotten he was still in the room with me.
“Shouldn’t you be at home, resting?” I sipped the amber liquid.
“Shouldn’t you be with Aria instead of here?” he countered.
“She’s better off without me. She always has been. I was stupid to think it would work. I should never have gone there.”
“When will you get out of your head and realise she’s the best thing to ever happen to you?”
I already knew she was the best thing to happen to me, which was why I knew it would never last. She was beautiful, and all I ever managed to do in life was break beautiful things.
“And when will you realise you need to stay out of my business?”
He snorted, leaning forward on the table. “You’re lucky I like you, because right now, you’re being a complete piece of shit to everyone that loves you.”
“I’m dealing with things in my own way.”
“By throwing yourself into the Organisation.”
“What else do you want me to do? Sit around feeling sorry for myself?”
“I think you should talk to someone.”
I snorted, trying not to burst out laughing. I was too far gone with that. Maybe when I was younger, it may have worked, but now?
“Never going to happen.”
Hayden leaned over, pulling me up by my collar and squaring straight up to me. He was always the calm one out of the two of us. It took a lot to get him angry.
“You need to fucking listen for once in your life,” he snapped. “If you carry on the way you are, all it’ll do is lead you down a path you’ll never be able to return from. All that road is, Ican assure you, is death. Is that what you really want? Is all of this worth that? Losing Aria for good? Never seeing her again because you’re too stuck in your feelings to do anything about it?”
I pointed my finger at his chest. “Don’t fucking lecture me about my life when you’re in this as well,” I bit back.
“Yeah, I am. I’ve been in it from the beginning, just like you. The difference is, you’re reckless at times. Consumed by your own guilt and misery. You can’t see what you’re doing now is wrong.”
“If I needed a fucking conscience, I would have asked for one. You don’t get to judge me. What I’m doing is what’s best for the Organisation. That’s all I’ve ever done.”
“By neglecting everything else around you? Sebastian, you had a good life with Aria, and you ruined it. You ruined it because you’re a coward.”
I pushed his chest, forcing him to take a step back as I turned away from him. “I don’t have time for this shit. I have somewhere to be.”
“That’s right, Sebastian. Walk away when things get too tough for you to handle,” he shouted as I stormed from the room.
50
Aria
Sitting at my desk, I watched the meeting reminder flash up for Caspian. I’d already sorted the paperwork he needed and taken it to him. It wasn’t for another two hours, but I’d set reminders so I didn’t forget anything. I wasn’t too sure how he’d be if I messed anything up. Although he’d been really nice so far, which I hadn’t expected. He’d also shown me a few things and asked me to help out more with meetings.
