“I know that is not what you truly wish to be focusing on right now,” Riordan insisted with confidence.
“Oh, do you?”
“I could feel your conflict. Your secret wish for me not to let you push me away right now,” he admitted.
“Ugh,Riordan! You are not supposed to read my mind without my permission!” I hissed at him in mortification. Jerking myface out of his hold, I pressed my cool palms over my cheeks that were flushed in embarrassment.
“You are hurt, and I ampainedto have been the one to make you feel that way. It is understandable that you need me to fight for your attention right now,” he assured me.
“I cannot—” I began, casting a glance at the orders on my desk, but he leaned forward to nuzzle my jaw with the utmost tenderness. The familiarity of his affection made me want to melt into him and let him help me make sense of my hurts and soothe my uncertainties.
“This comes first. Our love must come before all else, because everything will be built upon it,” he insisted.
“That isnothow you made me feel earlier!” I shouted, finally losing my composure.
“Please tell me how I made you feel,” he encouraged, welcoming the heat of my anger.
“You made me feel like I am your lesser!” I admitted, finally unleashing the painful truth that had been eating at me all day. Tears instantly burst in my eyes, stinging them when my makeup began to run. “I trusted you to keep me safe like you promised. This is not my world, it is not my people or my throne, and everyone here only respects me as much as you do! I am at… You are my only…”
Fuck. This wasnothow I’d wanted this conversation to go with him. I was supposed to be making him grovel, and now I was the one crying.
“I frightened you,” he realized with mortification.
“I never thought you would treat me like that. It felt… like a betrayal. It wasn’t just that you dismissed me like a misbehaving child, but you made me feel insecure here. You made me question if I am truly—”
“No, no,” he murmured, leaning closer to press kisses against my forehead. “Never question your place here. Today was…” Riordan hesitated and drew in a breath to compose himself before he continued. “I did not dismiss your offer to act as a negotiator because I think you are incapable of it. The truth is… You are right, Amira.”
I blinked in confusion. “Wait…What?”
“You are right,” he reiterated reluctantly. “Youarethe most logical choice to go for negotiations with Ahnnaòin. Considering your prior relationship with Ornella and the fact that you are not a griffin but still have authority—”
“I am a witch, feyhatewitches, and I have absolutely no authority!” I scoffed.
“You are empathetic but firm, and patient but decisive. You would be aperfectnegotiator,” Riordan maintained with obvious difficulty. I stared up at him in astonishment as emotion such as I had never seen in his eyes made all of my anger and fear fall away.
“And yet… you don’t want me to go,” I acknowledged more gently, and he shook his head, visibly struggling to contain himself now.
“It would be what was best for my kingdom, and yet, there is no reality in which I send you to Autumn Court. My reaction earlier was one of fear. I did not want anyone else to hear your logic. I do not want the King’s Council questioning why I cannot do my duty and use all available resources to defend my kingdom.”
“Riordan—” I began, reaching up to thread my fingers through his hair.
“It is purely selfish, I know that, but… I cannot.”
“But why could you not just tell me that rather than shutting me out all day?” I asked him.
“I did not fully understand my reaction until I talked it through with Orion,” he admitted. “I am so sorry, Amira. This wasmyweakness,myfear getting the better of me, andmyinability to be logical about you being in danger. And I hurtyoufor it. I am sorry!”
“It’s okay,” I assured him and leaned forward to press our foreheads together. “If you feel so strongly about it, then I won’tpush to go to Ahnnaòin. You are king—”
“It is no excuse. I do not want my rank to be a reason for me to be draconian when I am upset,” he said firmly. “You are my partner. My equal. Please do not consider this lapse of my fortitude to be a reflection of how I view you or our relationship,” he pleaded in earnest.
“Alright,” I agreed with a nod, and he breathed a sigh of relief before leaning forward to press tantalizing kisses along my jaw and down my neck.
“So… Orion managed to speak sense to you,” I said, trying to keep my voice teasing. Riordan gave a grunt of affirmation as he continued to kiss and nip at my neck until I was squirming in arousal on the desk.
“Does it surprise you that he would defend you?”
“Perhaps? No. Yes,” I finally decided, squinting at him in uncertainty when he raised his head to look down at me with raised brows. He laughed, but then his gaze dropped to my lips, and the humour was replaced with hunger.
