Julian was near the water with three dogs. His face bore the marks of exhaustion. Had he lost weight because the hoodie appeared to be bigger than before. I wanted to rush over to him and hug him though I needed to think about the signs and my subsequent apology.
He hadn't seen me yet. I moved closer, positioning the dogs so the signs would be visible when he looked up. Cooper whined, recognizing Julian's scent and that's what caught his attention.
Julian's head snapped up. His eyes found Cooper before traveling to the other dogs. And to the signs. His eyes filled with tears.
My hands were clenched at my sides to keep me from reaching for him. Every instinct I had told me to close thedistance and to promise everything would be okay. But I couldn’t, not when he was scared of what I was.
Tears spilled down his cheeks while his dogs pulled toward mine. Cooper and another dog greeted each other like old friends while Julian just stared at the signs on my dogs’ collars.
"Hi." My voice was croaky.
"You're walking dogs."
"Rita let me sign up for the day."
"Why?"
"Because you wouldn't answer my calls." I kept my distance, giving him space even though my wolf was howling to get closer. "And because I needed you to know I'm serious about us."
"Us." He wiped his eyes. "There can't be an us. You're a?—“
"A shifter. I know. But I'm still me, Julian. I'm the person who had dinner with you and kissed you in that parking lot."
"You're a wolf."
"Sometimes. But I'm human too. I’m both."
Julian looked at the dogs, then back at me. "I don't understand what I saw."
"I panicked." The memory made me wince. "When I realized you'd seen me in wolf form, I tried to shift back too fast and I lost control. I got stuck between forms for a few seconds."
"Is that normal?"
"No. It only happens when we're emotional or scared." I paused. "I was terrified of losing you."
He was quiet for a moment. The dogs had tangled themselves together and their leashes creating a familiar mess between us.
"Are there others?" he asked finally. "Other shifters?"
"Yes."
"How?"
"I can give you a history lesson."
"Can you control it?"
"Yes. I choose when to shift. Unless I'm in extreme danger or emotional distress, which is rare."
Julian's hands were shaking as he wiped his face again. "Are you dangerous?"
"Never." I took a careful step closer. "My wolf would die before hurting you. He’s part of me. He has his own wants and personality, but we're the same person."
"That doesn't make sense."
"I know. But it's the truth."
The leashes were completely tangled now. Cooper had wrapped himself around Bailey, and Scout was trying to chase Daisy. It should have been frustrating. Instead, it felt normal which I craved.
