Come on, Nancy. You’ve done harder things before, and there was a time when you could lie better than anyone.
She thought of herself all alone as a child, years before she met her foster family and Emily, surviving because she had no other choice. She was scared then, and she was scared now, but survival was paramount yet again.
She took a deep breath, looked Elsie in the eyes, and played to her strengths. “What made me want to do it again? Well, I believe no child deserves to feel alone or scared. Being a nursemaid, I believe I can help little Freya never feel any of those things.” She relaxed her mouth into a smile. “As for helping you deliver your child, I’m afraid my mother… died before she could teach me properly. I wouldn’t dare to try.”
All of a sudden, Elsie burst into tears, one hand on her belly and the other on her chest as she choked out between sobs, “That’s so… lovely. Och, I couldnae… agree more. Nay bairn should feel scared or alone.”
The man called Jack chuckled and put his arm around her, kissing the top of her head. “Our bairn willnae be,” he said softly. “Ye’ll be the finest maither there ever was.”
“What if I die, like her maither?” Elsie snuffled.
“Impossible. I willnae allow it. I’ll chase down the Lord himself and demand to have ye back if he ever dared to take ye from me,” Jack replied.
Nancy’s heart fluttered. She’d never heard a man say something so heroically sweet before. In fact, she couldn’t imagine anyone in her century saying something like that with such sincerity.Or maybe she couldn’t imagine someone saying it and her not rolling her eyes. But between these two, it was a sweet thing to hear. The two of them were clearly besotted with each other.
With her first real smile that morning, Nancy turned to look at Hunter… and jumped to find him staring back at her, his green eyes ablaze with something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. Whatever it was, it was fierce.
He’s probably just pissed off that you nearly wrecked the whole thing.
What else could it be?
She turned her gaze away and reached for a bowl of fat, glistening blackberries. Nerves had robbed her of her appetite, but she could at least eat a handful of those.
“It’s all bairns though, is it nae?” the man called Beathan remarked with a pensive look. “There’s nae much else a woman can do but birth bairns, help birth bairns, and help look after bairns, and then look after the elders. Important, aye, but it all comes down to bairns.”
Nancy nearly crushed a whole blackberry in her hand, glaring at the blond-haired, blue-eyed man. “Excuse me?”
“I mean nay offense, lassie,” he replied, his hands up. “Ye cannae fight battles. Ye cannae lead. All ye can do is raise bairns, either yers or someone else’s. It’s just how it is.”
Even though she was seriously considering launching a jug at his head, she couldn’t hear any malice or mockery in his voice. It truly sounded like he meant no ill will by it. And, to her dismay, Isla and Elsie nodded in agreement.
“Och, it’s the most important thing there is,” Isla crowed. “Although it’s probably nae theonlything. Queen Elizabeth would have had yer neck for sayin’ that. And our Mary, Queen of Scots. I willnae say Elizabeth did much good for us, but she was a fine leader of England.”
“Aye, but that’s an exception,” Beathan argued. “Queen Elizabeth would’ve done well tohavesome bairns, so her sons could be kings one day, but she didnae. More of a cautionary tale, if ye ask me.”
Nancy had heard enough. If she stayed here any longer, she would undoubtedly say something that would land her in trouble. To them, it likely wasjust the way of things, but that didn’t mean she could sit and listen to women’s contributions in society being boiled down to being broodmares.
I bet no one here has ever heard of invisible labor and how nothing runs without it.
She pushed back her chair and got up. “If you’ll excuse me, I’m not feeling so well. Long journey.”
She didn’t wait for permission, though she figured she was probably expected to ask for it.
With her head down and her hands balled into fists, she walked briskly out of the hall. Just past the doors, she paused, uncertain which was the right way back to her room.
Screw it. I’ll wander ‘til I find it.
She picked a direction and started walking again, vibrating with such annoyance that she could feel her own ire radiating off her.
At the foot of a staircase that might or might not lead her to where she wanted to go, she took a deep breath, too tired because of so much exercise so early in the morning.
She’d barely made it a few steps up when a deep voice echoed from behind her, “Wait.”
The tone was rough and commanding, and though she was half-tempted to try and run away from Hunter, that wasn’t what she’d agreed upon with her younger self. So she halted and turned, and waited for the scolding that his gruff voice let her know she was about to receive.
CHAPTER 8
Hunter climbedup the steps and joined Nancy in the narrow space. She immediately twisted her body and pressed herself flat to the wall, a faint gasp escaping her lips.
