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“That’s not a question I can answer.”
“Did she hint she might care about me?” he pressed harder.
“I can’t answer that, either. I can tell you, though, that while some women might sleep with a man solely for the purpose of manipulating him, I’d be shocked to my toes if Darby could pull it off.”
That was good enough for Seth. Marta obviously had reason to believe Darby cared about him. He turned on his heel, deciding it was time for a last-ditch change in tactics.
* * *
Darby hadn’t expected the overwhelming rush of despair that had enveloped her as soon as Seth left the inn. She’d been coping with anger, even loneliness for the past few days. But right now she felt like she was under water, as if the sunlight and oxygen had been sucked out of her world.
She swiped at a tear with the back of her hand, telling herself she wasn’t going to do this. No man would ever have the power to hurt her this way. She was tough, and she knew how to fight, and she would not let her own emotions defeat her.
She heard footsteps and felt relieved to know Marta was back. It was nearly five, not too early to blend a batch of margaritas. What she needed right now was a stiff drink, a tub of gourmet ice cream and a good friend. They’d talk it out, and in the morning the world would look brighter.
Maybe.
Darby honestly couldn’t picture that quite yet.
“Darby?”
Seth. Her stomach contracted in on itself.
“Darby?” he repeated.
She struggled to put on a brave face, praying no trace of her tears remained.
Gritting her teeth, she turned. “Did you forget something?”
A strange expression crossed his face. “Yeah, I did.”
“What?”
He moved straight across the room to stand in front of her. His expression turned to uncertainty. “I’m not going to ask you how you feel.”
“I feel fine,” she lied.
“Because that would be unfair,” he continued as if she hadn’t spoken. “But here’s what I want to say. If I elicit nothing in you, if your emotions flatline around me, then I’ll walk out of your life and never come back.”
Darby tried to tell him to go. She tried to force out the words that would take him from her life forever, but she couldn’t seem to make a single sound.
“But if you feel something, anything—confusion, frustration, longing, loneliness or even anger—then I want to show you something.”
“Show me what?”
A half smile grew on his face, and she knew she’d given too much away. She felt frustration. She felt confusion. She felt longing. And she sure felt anger.
“Come with me,” he told her softly, moving toward her. “Right now. I want to show you something. It’s important.”
“No.” She couldn’t do it. How could she do it? How could she risk feeling even worse than she felt right now?
“Please,” he asked her, every nuance of his expression, every note in his voice radiating sincerity.
She was so tempted, and she was so frightened by being so tempted.
“I feel like crap,” he told her. “I can’t do it. I can’t let it end like this.”
“It was always going to end like this.”
He reached out and took her hands in his. “It never should have.”
She felt tears burning at the back of her eyes. “I can’t, Seth.”
He unexpectedly smiled. “It’s not a flatline, is it?”
Her heart thumped in her chest.
“It’s not a flatline,” she whispered, pained.
He squeezed one of her hands in his, turning and towing her toward the door. “Then let’s go.”
“No, Seth.” She ordered herself to pull away, but his hand was so warm and strong around hers, that she couldn’t quite bring herself to break the hold.
“It won’t take long,” he promised.
“Where are we going?” She realized the question was as good as agreeing.
“Down the valley. I need to show you something.”
She stopped arguing, and she kept walking. She realized she wasn’t strong enough to tell him no. She wasn’t strong enough to give up this tiny chance to spend a few more minutes or hours with him.
They made their way to his pickup truck. They got silently inside. She fastened the seat belt over her hips, while he pointed the vehicle for the highway. A few minutes in, he tuned in a local station to fill the uncomfortable silence.
Darby wished she could come up with some small talk. But she couldn’t think of a single thing to say. The questions that burned in her mind were way beyond small talk. What was he doing? Where were they going? What could he possibly say or do to alleviate her heartbreak and the destruction of her life?
Finally, she gave up. She tipped her head back and closed her eyes. Her chest didn’t ache quite as much as it had the past few days. Even though she knew it was temporary, and he’d be leaving her again soon, his presence seemed to give her heartbreak a breather.
Two hours later, as the sun was setting, they passed beneath the Jacobs Ranch sign. Darby sat up straighter while they bumped their way up the long ranch road. She gazed out at the lush fields dotted with cattle, the river, the colored maple trees and the magnificent mountains rising beyond the Valley. She’d never been to his family ranch before.
“Your place?” she couldn’t help confirming.
“That’s right.”
“Are we going to see your family?”
She glanced down at her tattered jeans and faded T-shirt. She really wasn’t prepared to talk to anyone right now.
“No,” he answered.
She breathed a sigh of relief, watching the sights once more. She’d heard people say it was the most beautiful ranch in the Valley, and she could easily see why.
“Will you tell me what we’re doing?” she asked.
“Not yet. I want it to be a surprise.”
Darby couldn’t imagine what kind of a surprise would be at his ranch. “A horse?” she found herself guessing, though she was far from in the mood for humor. “A cow? A chicken?”
“Yeah,” he drawled sarcastically. “I brought you out here to see a chicken.”
“It’s a beautiful ranch,” she told him, the tension in her stomach easing a little more.
They were headed uphill, over faint tire tracks that crossed a sloping meadow. A picturesque lake fanned out in the twilight.
“I’ve always loved it,” he replied, bringing the truck to a halt, shutting down the engine and setting the brake. “Here we are.”
“So you wanted to show me a lake.”
“Yeah.” He smiled, opening the driver’s door.
Darby followed suit as he rounded the hood.
“I don’t understand, Seth.”
“You will.”
“I feel something,” she told him. “I’m hurt and I’m angry, and I’m afraid you’re making it worse.”
“I have no intention of making it worse.”
“I feel like everything is lies. I never should have slept with you.”
Seth looked genuinely regretful. “I thought you’d come and yell at me. I was okay with you getting angry. I wasn’t okay with you getting hurt.”
“Then you shouldn’t have betrayed me.”
He closed his eyes for a long moment. “Oh, Darby. I am so sorry.” His sincerity was clearly obvious.
“Thank you for that.”
Then he took her hand. “This way.”
She tried to hang on to her anger as they strolled through the meadow, but his apology had pricked her resolve. And there was something soothing about the smell of the fields, the fresh breeze in her hair and Seth’s solid presence beside her.
She tried to brace herself for even more hurt when this final interlude was over.
“There it is,” he said, and she looked up.
They had stopped in front of an overgrown homesite. She could see a potbellied stove, a crumbling chimney and the barest remnants of a small foundation. It took less than a second for her to realize where they’d come, remembering the view from the painting.
“It’s your great-great-grandparents’,” she muttered in wonder.
“This is the place.”
She had no idea why he’d brought her here, but she felt inordinately grateful. It was almost sacred ground. She could feel the roots of his family through the soles of her shoes.
“It’s even better than the painting,” she told him, dropping her hand from his, moving forward, trying to picture the family living here years and years ago.
“You like it?” he asked.
“I still agree with Mandy. Someone should carry on the family on this site.”
“Well, carry on something,” he said. He walked up behind her, putting his hands on her shoulders.
“I was thinking, after Travis told me about Sierra Hotel, that this would be a perfect spot to rebuild it.”
Darby’s insides turned to stone. She twisted her head to gape at him. Was he suggesting his family could replace Sierra Hotel? That somebody else should take her idea and run with it?
