We were barely making rent back then. Dad had left, and Mom was working double shifts. I knew, even at that young age, that her love came with conditions. One wrong move—one admission about the confusing feelings I had for boys in my class—and I’d be out on the street.
So, I learned to hide. Dated girls exclusively. Pushed down any other desires. I got good at it—so good that sometimes I almost convinced myself.
Even now, with my own place, my own money, my own life, I can’t shake Mom’s voice—it still echoes in my head whenever I look too long at a man, like that bartender.
“You survived by keeping this part of yourself locked away,” my therapist said once, years ago, before I stopped going. “But surviving isn’t the same as living.”
I drag my attention back to the present, to Mike’s concerned face across the table. He’s waiting for some admission, but I can’t give it to him. Not yet. Maybe not ever.
2
JULIAN
Purgatory’s obsidian walls are the perfect parcel for the steady heartbeat of the debauchery unfolding around me. I survey the room from my position at the private bar, ice clinking against crystal as I swirl my scotch. Everyone’s wearing masks tonight—some for anonymity, others for the fantasy.
“Julian.” Elliot Chambers nods as he approaches, his eyes tracking a lithe blonde across the room. “Quite the turnout.”
“The Blackwoods know how to draw a crowd.” My voice remains deliberately flat. I don’t do warmth—not here, not anywhere.
Across the main floor, Vane Blackwood is speaking animatedly, his green half-face mask accentuating eyes that flicker with barely contained violence. His younger brothers, Knox and Landon, flank him like well-trained wolves. Xavier’s absence is notable but unsurprising. The eldest Blackwood rarely attends unless it serves a specific purpose.
“Have you seen the twins?” Elliot asks, trying too hard to sound casual.
“By the east entrance. Hunting, as usual.”
The Dexter twins stand perfectly still amidst the movement. Ace surveys the room with a glance while Cyrus’s attention remains fixed on a woman in red.
Victor Kaine pushes past. The crowd parts instinctively—even here, among predators, hierarchy exists.
I catch Theo’s eye across the room. The nightclub owner tips his glass slightly in acknowledgment. Our gazes hold a moment too long before Dominic Vega interrupts him, leaning in to say something that makes Theo’s expression tighten.
“Careful, Frost.” Jenson materializes beside me, the Blackwoods’ spymaster moving with characteristic silence. “You don’t want to show your interest before the Hunt.”
I stare him down until he drops his eyes. “My interests are my business.”
“Everything in Purgatory is the Blackwoods’ business,” he counters.
I drain my glass and stand. Tonight feels different—electric with possibilities. The Hunt approaches, and everyone is measuring dicks.
I weave through the crowd. Everyone wants something—or someone—they shouldn’t have. My attention snags on Elliot again. I notice his gaze keeps drifting to Theo across the room. Interesting.
Approaching him again, I clear my throat. “Your art collection must be lacking if you’re studying the nightclub owner so intently,” I say, sliding beside him.
Elliot startles, his composure fracturing momentarily before he rebuilds it. “I’m studying the crowd, Julian. Professional habit.”
“Of course.” I smirk behind my mask. “And I’m here for the exceptional scotch.”
Theo catches my eye again, a hint of a smile playing at his lips before he turns his attention to a guest. His hands moveexpressively as he speaks. The man makes running three of Ravenwood’s most exclusive clubs look effortless.
“He’s an interesting specimen,” I continue, watching Elliot’s jaw tighten. “Completely comfortable in his skin. Rare quality.”
“I wouldn’t know.” Elliot’s voice drops a register, betraying him.
“No?” I lean closer, enjoying his discomfort. “You’ve never noticed how he commands attention without demanding it? How people gravitate toward his authenticity?”
Elliot’s knuckles whiten around his glass. “I’m not interested in men, Julian.”
“Did I suggest you were?” I raise an eyebrow. “Fascinating conclusion to jump to.”
