“Not between me and Riley.It’s what happened to me.”Cici didn’t speak but waited for her to go on.“When I was seventeen my parents died in a car wreck.I didn’t have any other relatives.Riley’s family took me in, so I didn’t have to go to foster care or live on my own.I lived with them until I turned eighteen and graduated high school.They’ve always treated me like family.”
“I’m so sorry.I knew your parents had died but I didn’t know any details.”
“Thanks.My parents were good people.I was happy.Well, as happy as a seventeen-year-old ever is.”She fell silent, thinking about it.“When they died my world fell apart.The two most important people in my life were simply…gone.And even though the Fletchers took me in, even though I love them and will always be grateful, I don’t ever want to experience a loss like that again.I can’t.Riley and I were supposed to be a fling.We were only going to date until New Year’s.I warned him from the first.”Even though he’d said he would still try to change her mind.“But Riley wants more.He said—He said he wanted to marry me.That he had almost from the first.”Which, if she were honest with herself, wasn’t a surprise.She’d worried about it, hell, had known it, even if she hadn’t wanted to admit it.
“But you don’t want that.So… What?You just plan to be alone the rest of your life?”
The short answer was yes.“Becoming independent was the hardest thing I ever did.If I fall in love with Riley I’ll lose that independence.If something happened to him, I don’t know what I’d do.I don’t think I could survive that kind of loss again.So I can’t fall in love with him.”
Cici took a sip of her latte and frowned.“Except the problem is youarein love with him.”
“I can’t be.”
“Oh, Letty.”She shook her head.“Don’t bother denying something you know is true.You’re in love with Riley and he loves you.What are you going to do about it?”
“Nothing.”
“You’re kidding.Nothing?”
“There’s nothing I can do except hope I get over him.”And that he got over her.But she was terribly afraid neither of them would get over each other.
“Then I have to ask you, have you thought about Riley at all?”
“What do you mean?”
“What about his feelings?He’s in love with you and it seems like all you’re thinking about it howyoufeel.How you’re scared.I’m not saying that doesn’t matter, but what about Riley’s feelings?They matter too.And if you’re in love with him—and you obviously are—then his feelings should matter to you.”
“I—it’s not that simple.”But had she thought about Riley’s feelings?Of course she had.She knew he loved her, but she’d believed he’d get over her.That he’d find some other nice woman and be happy with her.But what if he didn’t?Was she condemning Riley to a lonely life because she couldn’t deal with her fears?
And how would she feel if Riley did find someone else?
