“I’ll play with her and then read to her.”
“Her new favorite book isPat the Bunny.”
“Thanks.”Then Aria left Ryan with the baby, telling him she’d be in the kitchen.Whatever she was cooking smelled delicious.He didn’t think he’d have the willpower to turn down her invite.
His baby was growing up.She smiled and babbled and waved her tiny hands.And he could swear she was getting ready to crawl.After her bath he diapered her and put her down on her tummy on the rug in her room.He got out her jammies and when he turned around, she was up on her hands and knees, rocking.After he got her dressed he carried her into the kitchen.
“Did you know she can get up on her hands and knees?Isn’t that a precursor to crawling?”
“She just started doing that a couple of days ago.”
He’d missed it.Just as he’d miss a lot of firsts with Sophie since he wouldn’t be staying over anymore.He didn’t want to think about how depressing that was.
Ryan took Sophie back to her room, played peek-a-boo with her, read to her, gave her a bottle and put her to bed.Aria came in to kiss her good night.They both stood beside the crib, looking down at their baby.“She’s a beautiful baby.”He turned to Aria.“She looks like you.”
Aria smiled.“I think she looks like you.”
“Poor kid.”
“Ha-ha.She does.Look at the shape of her mouth.”
“Her mouth?It looks like a pretty little bow to me.Very feminine.”
Aria looked up at him.Tracing her finger over his lips, she said, “Hmm.You’re right.Your mouth isn’t at all feminine.”She removed her finger from his lips, only to trace his jaw.
“Color me confused.”If she wasn’t flirting with him then what the hell was she doing?
“I know it hasn’t been very long but I’ve missed having you here.”
“I thought that was what you wanted.”
“I thought so too until it happened.Until I’d had a chance to think and to talk to my dad.He reminded me that nothing is guaranteed and if I have a chance at being happy, I should grab it.”
She took his hand and led him into the other room to sit on the couch.“This is me grabbing it.”And she kissed him.
For a moment he took what she offered, sinking into the kiss, sliding his tongue against hers, putting his arms around her and holding her close.Instead of going with it, though, he pulled back.“I can’t do this, Aria.”
“You can’t make love to me?”
“No, because it wouldn’t be making love.If it’s just sex—”
“It’s not.Don’t you know I love you too?”
“No, I don’t know.You’ve been pushing me away because you don’t trust me.But then you pull me back in because—Hell, I don’t know why.I’m so damn confused I can’t think straight.But I know hooking up isn’t enough for me.I need more.”
He was crazy.What the hell was he doing, turning her down?Just because everything wasn’t lining up perfectly like he thought it should didn’t mean he couldn’t take what she offered.So what if it was only sex?That was better than going home alone and wishing he hadn’t left.
“What if I said I need more too?That what’s between us isn’t just sex to me.I want it to be more.I want it to be lasting.”
“How can it last if you’re waiting for me to leave?If it’s always there, in the back of your mind, that I might leave you at any moment?You told me you loved me but what good is that if you don’t trust me?”
“I do trust you, Ryan.”
He wasn’t convinced.
She stood, reached for his hand again.“Come with me.”
He let her pull him up.Followed her to her bedroom.Watched as she unbuttoned her blouse, as it parted to show her lacy white bra.No matter how many times he saw her, this first glimpse always made him wonder how he could have gotten so lucky.She reached behind her to unhook her bra, then dropped it to the floor.He sucked in a breath.Damn, she was beautiful.Her breasts were milky white, the nipples taut, the rosy peaks begging for his touch, for his mouth.
