"Rome, I need you to know something…"
His eyes rise to meet mine, and every ounce of the inner war he's fighting is present on his face. His hand slides down my arm to take my fingers between his, and then he sucks in a deep breath and sighs hard.
"I know you may be upset with me for keeping this from you, but I had my reasons." My lip is quivering, my palms sweaty as I say, "I'm… I, uh… I'm pregnant." I spit the words out and terror grips me, but he doesn't move a muscle, so to fill the awkward silence, I start babbling on like an idiot, hoping he doesn't erupt how I fear he may.
"I know what you're thinking, and I’m sorry I didn't tell you as soon as I knew. You wanted to have Dr. Levin check me out, and I was scared, and Sorin told me you'd be furious if I didn’t say something, so I promised her I’d tell you, but Rome, I'm scared and I never had sex before I met you and?—"
His lips claim mine in a searing kiss that swallows all of my fear and trepidation. And when I think I may pass out because I can't breathe, he kisses me harder, pulling me onto his lap until I'm sitting with my legs draped to the side and my arms wrapped around his strong, broad shoulders while tears streak down my cheeks hotter than ever.
"I love you, Mila, and I have no idea how to tell you that without sounding weak or foolish, but I do. I want you in my life, in my bed, on my arm."
"I think you're doing a pretty good job," I say, laughing as I wipe tears from my cheeks.
"I don't care at this point. I need you, do you understand? It was never the organization I wanted. It was always you. From the moment I saw what Vera was capable of, I saw you differently and I wanted you." He kisses me again, and again, peppering my face with his affection and drinking in my tears between words. "And I realize how much older I am than you and what people may say, but I don't care about that either."
I'm overjoyed, unable to catch my breath as I listen to him pouring out his heart for me. They're the same concerns I've had from the beginning, but they don't matter to me one bit now that I know he loves me.
"Roman, stop…" I press a finger to his lips to hush him and to halt the assault of kissing. He stops but his hands still grip my hips hard. "Did you hear me say I'm having your baby? That you'll be a father?"
He smiles and then laughs, and it's an explosive, booming laugh that infects me so I'm laughing with him. "Oh, Mila, you've made me the happiest man alive. Let's have a hundred babies."
The idea of even one more pregnancy right now sounds like torture. My stomach pinches a little and I shake my head. "One thing at a time, alright?"
He kisses me again, and this time it's a slow, lingering kiss that relaxes me into his grip. I never thought this would be the outcome from tonight's event, but then I never knew who Vera was either, or how badly I'd been deceived. I accept, however, that things were never as they appeared, and that makes me happier than I've been in a very long time.
"Here," he says, sitting back. I balance on his knees carefully as his hands pull back from my hips, and he tugs the ring off his right hand and holds it out to me. It's an odd gesture I don't fully understand. It's not an engagement ring, though I've turned down his proposal twice, anyway. "Have this."
"Rome, this is your ring. You're known for wearing it." I try protesting, but he closes my hand around it and shakes his head firmly.
"No, Mila, this is my promise to you… We can hire leaders if you don't want to lead, or we can sign the entire organization over to your father's most trusted men if you don't want it, but I'm not taking it from you. I want you, and nothing else…" He smiles. "You and this baby, I mean."
I smile at him, knowing what he's getting at without saying it out loud. "So, is this a proposal again?" I'm grinning, finally where I want to be after all this time.
"Not exactly. It's a promise I should've made when you offered to give it all to me if I married one of those horrible girls." He sounds totally disgusted by the idea of marrying one of my stepsisters, and it makes me chuckle.
"They were awful, right?"
"Terrible. Why didn't you warn me?" he asks, chuckling. Then he draws a hand down over his face as I sigh and look down at my father's ring.
"Ask me again," I tell him, staring at the signet that seemed to pull us together like the red thread of destiny.
"What?" he says, looking confused.
"Ask for me again," I repeat, looking him directly in the eye, and I watch as it dawns on him what I'm saying. I know how hard emotions are for him, and I'm not letting him off the hook easily. I want this moment to be something we remember our entire lives, not an arrangement we make to put order into our lives from chaos.
He smiles, and then the smile fades into a serious expression. When Roman speaks, everyone listens, and now I know why. He's an incredible man with a heart of gold, and he puts everyone ahead of himself at all times.
"Mila Radin, you are the most infuriating and contemptuous woman I've ever met, and it would give me the greatest pleasure of my life if you'd get off my lap so I can get down on one knee to propose to you. But since you’re stubborn as hell and you like conflict—" I press a finger to his lips and shush him.
"Marry me," I whisper, and he bites my finger, then sucks it to remove the sting.
"As you wish," he says, pulling me back to his lips for another kiss.
My heart is full and my life will never be the same. And I owe it all to this man.
30
ROMAN
