Cora smiles and grabs the big bandages from under the sink. “That works! I better go give one to Jake. He’s watching the truck show. He’ll want a Band-Aid too, right?”
“Right!” I repeat, refocusing on Violet’s smooth skin as I stick the bandage over the cut. “Do you really want a unicorn bandage on top?”
“Of course I do! Security will come after us if we don’t,” she laughs.
“Dad,” Cora hollers, “are we going to eat? I’m starving!”
“Speaking of,” Violet grins, “I’m pretty starved too. We need to get out there.” She twists her hair slightly to wring out some of the water as she says, “Oh, have you tried the TwoBrothers Detroit pizza before? Nash really outdid himself with that one. It’s to die for.”
I shake my head and stand from the edge of the tub, her smooth hand in mine as I help her up. If I had a choice in the matter, I’d lock the bathroom door, let the kids eat the pizza, and stay right here until the end of the night.
Toe to toe, we’re so close that our bodies nearly touch. Half a step is all it would take, and her breasts would be pressed against my chest, my cock would be poked against her belly, and her hair would be clenched in my hand.
The animal inside of me claws and aches, desperate to act on instinct, but I push him down and close him away in favor of the children in the other room and the realization that none of that could ever happen.
Violet is my best friend’s daughter, she’s my children’s nanny, and she’s twenty years younger than me.I should be chanting this mantra under my breath every second she’s around. I should have it branded on the inside of my brain. Thankfully, repeating it over and over again allows the message to sink in, though I can feel it losing its effectiveness the more I have to use it.
She smiles sweetly and steps out of the bathroom and toward the kitchen, where the kids sit at the table staring at the closed box of pizza. I’m following behind her, trying not to imagine that this is a normal Saturday night, and that this is my wonderful and carefree life.
Dinner is a blur of small talk about summer camp and Cora’s thoughts on letting the day campers play with the younger kids. Apparently, she hates it and thinks it should be banned. Jake nods profusely in her direction, so I gather that he’s thinking the same thing.
For four and five, they really do have a lot of passionate thoughts on the way the world should work. I may have a pair of justice warriors on my hands.
“I made some homemade brownies for you guys last night before I left,” Violet says, smiling toward me. “They’re in that Tupperware on the stove.”
Jake’s eyes widen as Cora hops down and drags her chair to the edge of the counter, helping herself to the container. “Me and Jake did all the taste testing.” She sets the box on the table and slides her chair back into place. “Ms. V says we’re professionals.”
“You two are the best taste testers around!” Violet adds. “Good job eating your vegetables tonight, too.”
“I did it because that means we get candy for breakfast!” Cora whips around aimlessly, flailing her arms in random circles like one bite of brownie has sent her over the edge.
“We will definitely have candy in our breakfast!” Violet says, taking a bite of the brownie herself.
“Ms. V,” Cora says, her tone dropping, “did your mom teach you this recipe?”
Violet glances toward me, then back at Cora. “Why do you ask, honey?”
“Well, I heard on TV that moms give you recipes, and I don’t have a mom, so I don’t think I’ll ever know how to make brownies.”
My heart cracks in half, and though it’s been years since Cora’s mom left, I want to find her and make her see what she’s done to this girl, though I don’t even know if she’d care.
“Honey,” Violet says, scooting to Cora’s side, “you don’t need a mom to know recipes. Anyone can teach them to you. A grandma, a friend, a brother, a dad, a nanny.”
“Wait,” she says, turning toward me. “So, you’ll tell me your secret brownie recipe, and I can tell my kids someday?”
“I’ll teach you a hundred recipes you can give to your kids someday.” Violet reaches out her hand toward Cora. “Deal?”
“Deal!” Cora grins and goes back to her treat like everything makes perfect sense now, and it does.
It makes perfect fucking sense, and I never want it to end. The echoing drumbeat of bad decisions slowly gets louder inside me, and I know no repetitive mantra is going to save me now. I’m going to have to leave the room immediately or I’ll be sending these kids to bed this second and claiming their nanny on the kitchen floor.
Chapter Five
Violet
I pass Cash on my way up the steps. His big, strong shoulder brushing against mine as he reaches for Cora, who’s hopping up and down, screaming his name.
“Dad! Dad! Dad! I don’t want to go to bed! I want to stay awake forever and see if the stars really shine all night long. Do you think they shine all night long, or do you think they conserve energy when all the people go to sleep?”
