“I can see Reg doing that,” Esme pants between giggles that shake her whole body.
“He even demonstrated a couple of moves. Wanted to bust out the old cowboy boots. I said there was no way he had any, and he went and got them. He meant it when he said they wereold. They were the rattiest pair of boots I’d ever seen. I don’t know when he wore them, or had time to wear them out like that. I’d only ever seen Grandpa in his old work boots.”
“Which he always wore.”
She glances down and toes my boots to make a point. I wriggle them on the grass we just stomped down. “They’re practical,” I say. “I could have packed sneakers or bullshit, but I like these. They’re worn in. Protective. I could kick a rock with them on, and my feet would still survive.”
“Is that something that happens often? That you need to kick rocks?” Her eyes sparkle and adrenaline sparks through me. I want to see them do that more often. All the time. Whenever she’s looking at me. Whenever she looks away. I want to see herhappy. Always.
“They’re heavy. They build leg muscle.”
Her eyes roam over my legs. There’s heat in them when she flicks them back up to my face. They soften and her body goes even softer, relaxed and unguarded. Her lips tilt up in the purest expression of happiness.
“Are those cameras on?” Esme asks, nodding at the one over my shoulder that I was about to replace.
Right. We came out here to do tech, not fall all over each other and get all mushy. For once, I couldn’t care less about cameras and screens. I’d way rather have this time, where it feels like we’re the only people in the world.
“Yup.”
“So anyone at the clubhouse could see what we’re doing?”
“They could, but I know Maverick and Dravin well enough to think that they’d smile about it, cheer us on, and then study some other screens and not look back for a while.”
She considers that, then looks at the door. “Are there cameras inside?”
“A few, but I turned them off when we got here. There’s no way that I’m gonna let anyone see you in pajamas or—or just walking around in there. I guess if I had to keep them on, I would have told you. It feels like an invasion of privacy, even if we’re doing things like cooking or nothing at all.”
Her tongue peeks out to moisten her lips. “So we could step through the door and have total privacy?”
“We could, but…”But… I want to go slow. But… I don’t want to mess this up. But… I don’t want to chase you away.
She untangles herself but keeps her hand in mine. The door isn’t far. She leads me inside. As soon as she steps through, she balls her hands in my shirt and tugs me in behind her. The door slams shut loudly, brutally. I don’t give a fuck. It could be broken, hanging off its hinges, and I wouldn’t care, because Esme shoves me into the wall. She presses up against me,trapping me. I can’t get any air before she stands on her tiptoes and her lips crush against mine.
This is nothing like the kiss outside. Tension explodes between us. Years of longing and wishing and wondering what this would be like. Nothing that I imagined or dreamed could ever come close to the reality of her. How soft she is against me, her curves melting into my body as my arms close around her to pull her closer and to shelter her. I never could have imagined the heat, or how her lips move and tangle with mine. How her tongue darts out and laps against my mouth, hot and wet. I moan and part, and then her tongue is in my mouth. Not all the way, but a little. I meet it with mine, andholy shit,I’m going to pass out. Black spots dance in front of my eyes and they’re not even open. I swallow her whimpers and her breath. I drink her in, inhale her sweetness and the rest of her.
I wantmore. I just…want.
I cup her face with both palms and drive deeper as I sink my fingers into her hair. She strokes my tongue with hers, this time all the way, with the whole length, and I get so dizzy that I have to lean against her to hold me up.
Her hips writhe against mine in a roll that takes my breath away. My cock is so hard. Another grind against it and there’s a good chance that I’ll explode. In my jeans.
Her heart hammers against my chest and she moves again. I barely make it through. I have to tear my lips away from hers and then the rest of me. She’s flushed and mussed, her eyes blown out. Her lips are red and swollen, shoulders heaving as she pants.
I did that. Oh my fucking god, I did all of that.
“I wanted you to have a proper kiss.” She strokes my chin and then her thumb traces over my tingling bottom lip. Goosebumps explode all over my skin. “Where no one else could see but us.” Her arms fold around me and she holds me, hugging me like she never wants to let go.
I groan and sag even harder against her like all my muscles have turned to jelly at the same time. I wondered for so long if it would feel right between us, or if it was all in my head.
“Sorry.” I’m probably ridiculously flustered. “I had to stop—I… want to do all the little things with you. All the things we used to do. I want friendship and laughter. I want the mundane. I want to figure it all out. I want to have meals together, share music, share all the details of our days. I want to help you figure out what you want to do, and I want to protect your peace wherever we are. I want to ask you about your day and share mine. I want soft kisses and starlight. I guess… romance. I want you to have romance before we…” God, I’mterribleat this.
Her hand presses harder into my chest. “That’s lovely, Wizard. You’re right. Slow is best.” She kisses me sweetly, right on the corner of my mouth.
“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
“Like you ever could.”
I close my eyes and try not to wreck myself. “I know that me loving you doesn’t magically change or fix everything. It’s not going to right all the wrongs in the world or erase all the hurts. I want to be realistic and keep myself grounded.”
