“Vanya,” he murmured again. He turned his face to me, and I stared at his pretty, long, dark lashes that fanned over his cheeks and the very tiny eyelids above them.
Were they soft, I wondered? As soft as the rest of him? As tender?
“Micah?” I said when he didn’t go on.
“It can’t happen again, okay? It’s just…it’s not good for either of us.”
“Okay, but…” I held my tongue for a moment, trying to find the words.
“What?”
“Did I hurt you? Make you feel unsafe? Or scared? I know I can be too much?—”
Without warning, Micah’s hand reached out, found my cheek, and he dragged me into a hard, deep, powerful kiss. His tongue pushed along mine, tasting every inch of my mouth before pulling back and panting against my cheek.
“You didn’t make me feel unsafe. At all. But that’s part of the problem. And I mean it. This can never happen again.”
I didn’t believe my pretty little goalie, but I also could respect his boundaries. When he pulled back for a final time, I shifted out of the booth seat and took the one across from him, getting up when the server called our number.
Alexio appeared a few minutes after that, and if he noticed tension between us, he didn’t say anything about it. He ate in relative silence, laughing a little when he got a text that was clearly from Jonah, but Micah didn’t ask, so I didn’t either.
I was too busy being distracted by my unending, overwhelming lust.
What I wanted was to pin Micah to the wall, toalmostkiss him, to make him beg for it, only to remind him that not having was what he wanted. Then I would tell him I would be ready and waiting for him whenever he got over the thing holding him back.
But I didn’t.
Not even close.
Whatever was keeping him emotionally hostage seemed like a heavy weight on his shoulders, and it wouldn’t be fair of me to push him. I was unused to letting something go when I wanted it this badly, but for Micah, I could.
I could follow my stepmother’s advice and be patient for him.
And in the meantime, we could be friends. Or something like it.
Whatever he had room for in his life. It wouldn’t be easy, but I’d meant what I said when I told Micah I wasn’t here for easy things. I liked to work for what I had, and having him would be no different.
“So, uh,” Alexio said after a tense silence. “Your brother called while I was outside.”
Micah snorted. “Is that supposed to be news? You two are always licking up each other’s assholes.”
Alexio flushed, which made me realize it was probably true in some respect. I wouldn’t mind having a taste of Micah, but I wasn’t sure how long I was going to have to be patient, waiting for him again.
“He asked me to ask you?—”
“Jesus Christ,” Micah interrupted from behind analmost-angry sigh. He pushed up to his feet. “This is so high school. I’m going to call him.”
He snagged his cane and whipped it in front of him, all but crashing into several tables before he found the door and let himself out. I watched him out the window for a moment, then went back to attacking my chicken.
“He’s pissed at me,” Alexio said after a long silence.
“No. He’s pissed at his brother,” I answered through a full mouth. “Don’t worry, he likes you.”
Alexio didn’t look like he believed me, but frankly, I didn’t care. “Their dad isn’t doing very well.”
My stomach sank. I was never emotionally close with my father, but I would be devastated to lose him. And I lived in perpetual fear of losing my stepmother. I knew Micah and Jonah weren’t close to their family. The whole situation the year before with their dad was…a lot.
And it was confusing.
