Chapter Six
Jag gripped his phone tight.He was sitting in one of the small consultation rooms they used to meet with clients. He didn’t have much time before he would be found by his friends. He hadn’t wanted to make the call to Steff at his workstation where everyone could hear. But his absence would be noted, and Fox and the others would put two and two together and come up with four. And when they did, they’d go searching for him.
He wasn’t going to rush the conversation, though. He’d taken a big risk telling Steff about the dangers of his job. How one wrong move could end his freedom and his life.
The reason he’d done it was because he wanted everything out in the open. He didn’t want to start seeing her and then spring this information on her. It was better to get it all out before things got too serious between them, because it would be even harder to end things when more emotions were involved.
If what he did was a deal breaker, then that would be it.
“Steff, are you still there?” The silence had dragged on. Worry settled low in his belly. He’d said too much.
“Yeah, I’m here, I’m just. It was a lot.”
“I know. I’m sorry. But I wanted you to know what I’m feeling. Where I’m at. And that I’m serious about wanting to get to know you.”
Jag should probably tell her he was the one who carried her out the night she was rescued.
He’d seen her at her worst. She had been wearing nothing but underwear that looked as if the cotton threads holding it in one piece would disintegrate at any moment. The blanket that she’d clutched around her shoulders was nothing more than a scrap of dirty material.
He would tell her, but not yet. Not after everything he’d laid at her feet.
“Why?” So much anguish in that one three letter word.
“Why do I want to see you?”
“Yes? Why would you want to spend time with me? I’m hardly functioning. I’m not worth it.”
God, he wished they were having this conversation in person so he could hold her. Show her she was most definitely worth getting to know. And that she was functioning. People who couldn’t function didn’t keep their houses clean like she did. They would let the mess grow. Things would be too difficult for them to cope with. They would be unkempt.
Steff wasn’t any of those things.
Her place wasn’t stark, like she cleaned obsessively. There were still homey touches in every room. Bright cushions in the living room. A fake plant on a counter. A couple of magazines neatly stacked on her coffee table.
When he’d done his sweep, he’d had to go into her bedroom, and that room looked like a haven with its cozy chair in the corner of the room, pale pink comforter and brighter pink pillows.
“You are functioning. You’ve just forgotten how to thrive.” He wanted to be the person remind her how to.
Silence stretched between them and he worried he’d pushed her a little too hard.
“Can I see you tonight?” he asked when she still hadn’t said anything. He knew he was being a little pushy, but believed it would help if they were face to face. “I can pick up some food. I also know I’m asking a lot. Please Steff, I do want to see you.”
He didn’t care if it sounded like he was begging. He wasn’t going to give up on her.
Through the phone he heard the rustle of fabric, as if she was moving around. Was she pacing? Or was she just shifting into a more comfortable position?
“Okay.” The word a soft whisper. “I think I’d like that.” Her voice finished stronger, as though she was happy with her decision.
Jag’s eyes drifted shut in relief. “Thank you. I know I dumped so much on you. I’m aware of how hard it is to open your home to me.”
“No, it’s okay. But yes, you did lay a lot on me, but now that I’ve had a little time to let it all sink in, I’m glad you have.”
He may not have known her for long, but Jag doubted that she would lie to make him feel better. “I’m glad too. Now what’s your favorite takeout? Burgers, pizza, Thai, Chinese, Japanese? Any other cuisine I may have missed?”
Another soft giggle sounded in his ear, and he loved hearing it. Wanted her to laugh more. “What if I said all of it?”
“Then I’d say I’ll be driving around a lot, and might not get to you until late, and most of the food will be cold.”
“We can’t have that. What’s your favorite?” she asked, lobbing the ball back in his court.
