“We are,” Rani says with a smile. “It’s not Alex I’m worried about, it’s you.”
“Why are you worried about me?” I scoff unconvincingly. “I am perfectlyfine. Everything isfine. It is allgood.”
“Ha, you keep telling yourself that, Ava,” she says. “You who have gone from zero love interests to two in record time and one of them is a... not human. This being the same person who couldn’t get out of bed for a week because they changed the recipe in your favourite breakfast cereal.”
“You don’t understand. You can’t just change things without prior warning,” I tell her. “They should have given written notice or something.Anyway, I don’t think Forrest counts as a love interest. I think he’s a lust interest.” And the image of his naked chest appears in my mind’s eye. “It’s weird, Rani. There’s something about him that makes me want to lick him. Like an ice cream. All over, even, you know,there. Especially there, actually. I mean, what the hell is that about?”
Rani shudders with laughter as she turns to look at me, her eyes bright.
“That’s lust,” she says. “A physical attraction to someone will do that to you. But just because something starts with off-the-chart chemistry, it doesn’t mean it can’t become something deeper. At least that’s what all the books and movies tell us.”
“Yeah well,” I say. “I think books and movies have a lot to answer for. If it wasn’t because the closest thing I’ve ever had to a real-life romance is a character from a novel I first read at theage of fourteen, Hal wouldn’t have got it into his mainframe to design himself into a living, breathing, kissing version to make me happy.”
“How was the kiss?” Rani asks. “Every time I try and find out, you change the subject.”
It’s not because I don’t want to talk about it, I’m just not sure how to talk about it.
“It was... nice,” I say, with a smile. “Really nice. It felt exactly like I imagined it would to kiss Kai Raider if Kai Raider was also my friend, but also, maybe because of that, it didn’t feel exactly real.” Taking a breath, I realise it’s time to fess up to the full extent of this self-created nonsense. “But I did also sort of almost kiss Forrest just before and that was like being set on fire with flammable pleasure, so, there’s that.”
“Wow, you’ve entered your slut era,” Rani laughs. “Oh my God, you just casually went and rubbed yourself all over another man on the way to your first kiss! I love it.”
“I’m a terrible person!” I cry, covering my face. “And I’m too old for this. This is teenage-years nonsense. This is round-the-back-of-school-after-the-Friday-dance nonsense. Honestly, I need to get a grip.”
“Of Forrest’s massive...”
“Rani!” I squeal, clapping my hand over her mouth. She removes it.
“You do know that you don’t have to be in a relationship with Hal, even he’s made that clear. Hopefully he means it when he says it’s up to you and he isn’t about to set about the destruction of the world out of hurt feelings, or something. I mean it’s not like it’d be the first time a man has done that.”
“A human man, true. But Hal is so much more than just human, and he really means it,” I assure her. “Anyway, there’s a big part of me that wants what Hal has to offer. He feels like a kind of homecoming. And I’m pretty sure if we did have sex, it would be really nice. And there would be orgasms. And he’d make me a cup of tea after.”
“But...?” Rani prompts me.
“I want to tear Forrest’s clothes off and lick his...” I bite my lip. “And the thing is, is that for some reason that I don’t truly understand, he wants that too. It’s unprecedented in the history of Ava.”
“So, there’s a few days left here. Just get to it with Forrest at every available opportunity.” Rani shrugs.
“Can’t.” I shake my head.
“Why? You’re adults! You’re single! You have opportunity!”
“Because Forrest is a dad, and he’s just starting to find his feet again after losing his wife, and he lives on the other side of the world, and that might sound ideal for a quick, sexy fling, Rani, but...”
“You think you’ll catch feelings, fall in love, and then he’ll be gone, and you will have to marry your Robot,” Rani says. “It’s sort of like sci-fiJane Eyre.”
“I have feelings already,” I admit. “He’s an amazing man. With a lickable penis.”
“Dear God, who are you and what have you done with Ava Green?” Rani squawks. She reaches for my hand. “Jessica’s big fancy wedding is just about ready to kick off outside. Why don’t we go and hang around and rate outfits out of ten. More fun than being in here not doing anything, right?”
“Not sure,” I say uncertainly.
“That’s it!” Rani gets up. Grabbing my wrist, she starts dragging me across the shiny floor towards the door. “We are going to have an objective look at what the culmination of a love story looks like and decide if it’s worth all the effort dealing with blokes just to get to the nice dress part. Come on, madam.”
Reluctantly, I get up, and we step outside the lab.
To my horror, I see Hal approaching from inside the house, and Forrest is just coming in through the garden.
“Stop!” Rani holds up her palms at each of them. “Do not speak to her, do not look at her, do not approach her. We are having a love interest–free day.”
