He nods, slowly. ‘It’s definitely from her, but she doesn’t sound good. Oddly conversational. But detached, you know? As if she’d taken too much medication.’
‘What did she say?’
He pauses. I’m surprised he’s told me even this much. He’s always kept Janice well out of my reach: the times we met after my cancer diagnosis four years ago, he wouldn’t even use her name.
‘She said she’s alive. Apologised for disappearing. Said she needs to be alone at the moment.’
I wait.
‘It was a relief, of course. A huge relief. But it’s very worrying. To just walk out on her life, then wait two weeks before writing to us – and even then, to sound like she’s just updating some distant relatives ... That’s not her. She can’t be well.’
‘So will the police still help? If they know she’s alive?’
Jeremy picks up his tea again. ‘Yes, but it’s scaled right back now. We’ve told them she’s vulnerable but they’re less interested. Which, I suppose, is understandable, but it’s very hard to take.’
I nod. What a desperate situation. If Leo just disappeared – no warning, no note, nothing – I don’t know what I’d do.
I search for something to say. ‘Ah ... So – where was the letter posted?’
‘No idea,’ Jeremy says. He looks at a criminally awful watercolour on the wall, one of many the rental cottage owner has painted.
‘No postmark?’
Jeremy shakes his head. ‘Letters tend not to get postmarked anymore.’
‘Really? I didn’t know that.’
‘Well, you do now. But as I said, there was also a letter for you in the envelope.’
There’s a caution in his eyes. ‘I’ve read it, obviously. Just in case there was anything that might help us trace her. So I can tell you now that it’s not what you’re hoping for.’
He leans forward to retrieve the letter from his back pocket, which I take, wordlessly. It does not sit well with me to hear him talk about my hopes, when he’s spent years battering them.
‘I’ll leave you to read it,’ he says, getting up. ‘Get back to the cottage.’
‘Hang on.’ I put the letter on the coffee table. ‘Before you go, I’d really like you to explain why you complained about Leo to his boss.’
This surprises him: I think he’s actually embarrassed. For a few seconds the only sound in the room is the wind tracing in from the sea.
‘You’re right, I did complain,’ he admits. ‘And I hope it didn’t cause him too much trouble. But none of the other papers dug up the story about the postnatal psychosis. I panicked.’
‘Well, then the other newspapers’ journalists are crap. Why punish Leo for doing a thorough job?’
‘I’m sorry. It took me so completely by surprise that I thought you must have come clean with him. About our history. I thought he was trying to send me a message.’
‘I could never tell Leo,’ I remind him. ‘You know that better than anyone else.’ Besides, the idea of Leo sending a coded message to Jeremy via a newspaper article is ridiculous. I tell him that.
‘Well, my wife has gone missing,’ Jeremy says, flatly. ‘Forgive my inability to think cogently.’
I take a breath. ‘Let’s start again. I’d like to read this letter with you here. Will you stay a bit longer?’
He thinks for a moment, then sighs, ‘OK.’
‘Mummy?’
Ruby stands in the doorway. My warm girl; a little puff of blonde with eyes scrunched against the light.
I cross the room at the speed of sound. ‘Hello! Why are you up?’
