Taking a fresh pack of cigarettes out of my pocket, I slam it against my palm before opening it and lighting up.
I lean into the wood against my back, closing my eyes. I let the smoke fill my lungs until I feel like I’m going to explode before exhaling.
The nicotine high takes over, my body buzzes, and I enjoy the temporary weightlessness I feel.
The cigarette is pulled from my mouth, almost knocking me off-balance, and my eyes fly open.
Rhett is standing there, with my half-smoked cigarette hanging from his lips as his eyes roam over me.
Fuck, if that doesn’t make me want to ruin him all over again.
Cocking my brow, I keep my tone indifferent. “Can I help you, Rhett?”
His rebuttal comes swift and direct. “You’re not the only one who needs a break from everything, Colton.”
“That might be the most honest thing you’ve ever said to me. I’m impressed.”
Scoffing, he bites back, “I’m a fucking honest person, Colt. I’ve told you what I feel andhowI feel, you just can’t accept it.” He takes another drag of my cigarette and I want nothing more than to replace it with my cock.
“Oh, really, Golden Boy. I can’t accept it? That’s rich.” Pulling myself away from the wall, I plant my feet in front of him. “I didn’t see you running when your dick was in my mouth, or when I kissed you last night. So, let’s try that again.”
Blowing smoke into my face, he stays silent as I inhale it all. My mouth forms an “O” shape and his eyes drift to my lips as I push out the smoke, creating a couple of rings that land in his face.
“Nothing? That’s what I fucking thought. You will always be in your own way for no fucking reason, other than pride. At leastI can be honest that I fucking want you. I want you so bad it hurts.”
As I step back, he grabs me around my neck, closing the gap between us and tossing the cigarette to the ground. Our lips clash and his fingers thread into my hair while I dig my fingers into his hips.
While our tongues stroke against each other, he backs me into a wall. Then he groans and pulls back, pupils blown.
“This means nothing.”
His words spur me on. I’m fucking sick of his bullshit. I don’t need anyone else to know if he’s not ready, but I want the truth. He could at least be honest when it’s just us.
“I’m not a fucking piece of meat, Rhett. I’m a person, just like you. If it means nothing, like you say, then walk away. I won’t chase you this time,” I challenge, waiting for him to release his hold on me.
He stays silent, a war raging in his head.
Making sure I’m not being cruel, I speak softly. “I’m tired of the lies, Rhett. Either you want me or you don’t, but we both know the truth. You just need to be honest with me.”
His fingers loosen in my hair, and I brace for the fight to come.
Come on. Man, the fuck up. Be done or don’t.
Just pick.
“I’m not supposed to want to be with a man—it isn’t right. So, why can’t I stop this.”
My eyes widen a fraction, and I feel like the cat who caught the canary.
“Get on your knees. Now.”
“I can’t.”
“Don’t make me ask again. Get out of your head and just be here, with me.”
His hands slip from my hair, and I let his hips go as he sinks to his knees in front of me. My fingers find his chin, and I angle his face to look up at me. Uncertainty fills his face.
That won’t do. Let’s bring that fire back.
