I shot him a teasing grin of my own and canted my chin. “Surprised, Mr. St. Clair?”
“I should not be, considering everything your cousin has shared,” he said, shaking his head in wonder. “But is it too soon to admit that I might be smitten?”
My cheeks flamed at the admission, my heart thumping in my chest. “You do not even know me, sir.”
“True, but it’s strange how much I feel like I do,” he said. “Your cousin…you’re very similar, but so different. I can’t explain it without sounding foolish. Even this conversation feels outlandishly familiar and comfortable as if we’ve already spokenat great length, though I can’t imagine how.” He raked a hand through his hair, the loose waves falling every which way. “In truth, I feel like I’ve known you my whole life, and I know that’s an extraordinarily peculiar thing to say to someone I’ve just met. Forgive me, if I am overstepping.”
“You’re not,” I whispered, staring at him. “I know exactly what you mean.”
“You do?”
The desire to confess the whole farce sat heavy on my tongue, but it would ruin everything. I wanted St. Clair to have a real chance to fulfill his dream. If there was anything I could do to make a difference with the limited power I had, I needed to do it. I shrugged easily. “Perhaps we knew each other in another lifetime or somewhere else in the cosmos. The universe is infinite, after all.”
“No,” he murmured. “That’s not possible.”
“Why not?” I asked, my heart stopping.
His eyes were filled with wonder. “Because there’s no other universe or lifetime in which I could ever forget meeting someone like you.”
Chapter Eleven
But if I have done the public any service this way, ’tis due to nothing but industry and a patient thought.
—Isaac Newton
Will stared at me, his round face wreathed in disappointment. “Wait, you’re going to be gone for the rest of the term? How is that even possible? What about examinations?”
“My uncle is the Duke of Delmont,” I replied as I packed up a few of my belongings. “He gives a significant endowment to Cambridge. I have important duties I must attend to in London. As far as examinations, I don’t have to take them. They’re only a formality.”
I had no legitimate reason to take the tests, other than to prove something to myself, especially since Ansel was on track to graduate with an ordinary degree, the one most aristocrats aimed for with the minimal amount of study and effort.Hehad nothing to prove or to gain. In fact, he probably would have received his degree anyway without me being here this term.
“And your tutor?” Will asked. “Surely he has something to say about your departure?”
“Mr. St. Clair will accompany me to make sure that I stay on track with my studies. It has all already been authorized with the Master of the College. My uncle submitted the formal petition, which was approved.” The letter with my father’s stamp was yet another crime I added to the litany of the ones I’d committed since setting out on my adventures, but was it really hurting anyone? The college was still getting its money, and Alter Ego Ansel required formal approval to continue his course of study while I was in London. I stopped my packing to glance at Will. “I will still see you in town. It’s truly not the calamity you’re making it out to be.”
“I don’t want to lose my friend,” he said morosely, and his sad admission made my heart twinge. “I know the twins and Harold and James are my mates, but you’re the only one I’ve felt close to, since well…you know, the viscountcy.”
I understood what he meant. All the other peers here gave him a wide berth, as if they instinctively knew he wasn’t one of them. Luckily, none of them were part of my immediate set or I’d give them a piece of my mind.
“You won’t lose me and you’re going to be fine. I’ll only be a few hours away. And who knows? I may be back before you know it.”
“It’s already nearly June,” he said. “The term is over next month.”
I moved to stand in front of him, swiping my forearm across my sweaty face. “Will, pull yourself together, for heaven’s sake! This short absence won’t be the end of the world. I’m still enrolled and have no intention of withdrawing before the end of term. We have many weeks left.”
In truth, staying in London for a fortnight or two felt like a bit of a much needed reprieve. The lengthy trips back and forth had started to take an unexpected toll, and keeping up the pretense of being two people was much more difficult than I’d anticipated. I’d slipped up several times in recent days due to exhaustion.
“This is how it’s done all the time with aristocrats who have obligations in London during the social season. With any luck, it will only be for a short while.” As I spoke, his stare settled on my mouth…my upper lip to be precise, and I frowned at him. “Are you even listening to what I’m saying? What is so interesting on my face?” I groused.
“You have a bald spot in your mustache,” he said.
I blinked at him and immediately covered my mouth with my palm. “What?”
Glancing down, I found the rogue tuft hooked to my sleeve. In dismay, I pressed my fingers to my lip, locating the smooth patch, and attempted to brush some of the remaining hairs over it. The sweat must have dislodged them somehow or maybe the adhesive paste was reaching the end of its life.
“I pick at my facial hair when I get anxious. More of a reason for me to leave now,” I explained hastily, knowing it was a rather flimsy excuse that a child could see through, but either Will was too overcome with emotion to make sense of it or he chose to ignore it. “It’s a nervous condition like biting your fingernails,” I added.
“I’ll tell the lads you said goodbye,” he said in a forlorn voice. “They will be miffed they didn’t get to see you off.” He perkedup, eyes brightening. “Maybe we can all come visit you in London. Can you imagine? They would love that!”
