Part of me nearly got on my knees and begged for it. To go back to that small space where I existed with my beautiful Fallon. To be alone with her memory, rather than out here where she was so very absent.
I’d given up, I remember that vividly. The feeling of wanting to do nothing more than fall into the void. I knew it was wrong, but I was weak. Drained.
Most of all, I was so very fucking lonely.
I couldn’t understand the Creators then, despite how much they screamed. But I had …her.
My Other.
She’d taken over. Done terrible things I barely registered while I recoiled away. Took a blade to the gut in the process—something I noticed when she slipped back beneath my frosty lake, leaving my body so much colder than it was before she’d risen.
I’d emerged to find Sereme amidst the dark tunnel like a smear ofcoloragainst the dim, tapping her fingernail against a jar dangling from a chain around her neck—much faster than my fading heart was beating.
I had the fleeting thought that Fallon would’ve loved her jacket inall its shapely purple elegance, with bursts of fluffy purple feathers poking out the trim. Like a Moltenmaw. Was thinking about that when Sereme told me she could stop my heart from giving out, but that I first needed to drip my blood into the vial.
I told her to fuck off and leave me to die in peace, but then she spoke ofrevenge. Painted such a pretty picture that soon fell apart in my hands, like a sodden piece of parchment—
“Has this cavern changed much since you last entered?”
At Kaan’s voice, I jerk from the memory, spinning. Find both he and Ahvi have made their way through. “No. Why?”
While Ahvi wedges my satchel off my shoulder, taking its weight, Kaan scans our surroundings with fierce eyes, brows pinched as he scents. “I’m trying to work out how someone who had the power and knowledge to stitch a blood bind discovered you all the way out here, where even the Underfolk don’t dwell.”
I open my mouth, about to speak when his words sink deep enough to find proper purchase.
Actually, he’s got a point.
Frowning, I look down the dark tunnel, picturing Sereme in her perfect purple coat that bore not a single speck of dirt. Her hair was coiffed—smooth and clean. Not at all like the Undercity residents, or even someone who frequents it. Something I know now, but then … I didn’t think anything of it, giveneverythingwas new to me.
“I’ve never thought of that,” I hate to admit, rooting through my pocket for the unfolded lark I’d all but forgotten about. The pale-brown one I found in Sereme’s desk but didn’t finish reading.
I flatten it against my palm and skim the text by the crisp light seeping in through the hole we clambered through:
SEREME,
SHOULD SHE WANT TO SAVE A CLUTCH OF WOUNDED NULLS, SO BE IT. IT IS OF LITTLE POLITICAL INFLUENCE AND DOESN’T AFFECT MY PLANS. THE REQUIRED RESOURCES ARE TO BE PUT TO HER DISPOSAL.
I’VE BECOME AWARE THAT YOU’RE USING THE BIND TO MAIM HER MORE FREQUENTLY THAN WE DISCUSSED. THERE WILL COME A TIME TO POKE THE BEAST, BUT WE’RE NOT THERE YET.
YOU FORGET, YOU HAVEONEJOB: KEEP HER UNDER CONTROL, PLUCKING THE POLITICAL WEEDS THAT POSE A THREAT TO MY RISE, UNTIL I’M READY TO BRING HER HOME. SHOULD YOU FAIL ME ON THIS, I WILL BE MOST DISPLEASED.
ELDING.
My blood becomes a gushing torrent.
This correspondence … They’re talking aboutme.
My gut knots as I go back over specific lines until I feel like the tunnel’s tipping.
Kaan eases the lark from my grip, and I watch him read it, brows pinching into a deeper frown with each line he skims. “You found this in Sereme’s office?”
I nod. “Something doesn’t sit right …”
“I agree,” he murmurs, folding it into a tidy square he tucks into his pocket, cutting a look both ways down the tunnel as he blows warm air into his hands. “Let’s get this over with.” He turns to Ahvi, now sitting cross-legged on the ground with his cloak puddled around him, rooting through my satchel, surrounded by bottled tinctures, an empty mug, a wooden bowl, and the Book of Voyd—unbound, split open at a seemingly random page. “Ahvi, is there something we can do to help?”
It takes me too long to realize he’s set himself up exactly where I dripped my fucking blood into that vial.
“Not really. It’s mostlymethings.” He pulls his hood back just enough I’m able to glimpse his eyes from behind unruly silver locks, reminding me of the aurora ribbons in this low light. “But I need Raeve over here so I can begin mapping out the binding loops.”
