After a few tense moments, Bette cleared her throat. "We'll see you in a few minutes, Mother."
"Fine."
Kerrie licked her lips and squinted against the sun at Bette, her hands stuffed in her pockets. "I'm guessing she didn't know I was going to be here?"
A nudge of guilt hit her stomach. "I was still hoping that she would change her mind and not come. If I had told her about you, she would have definitely shown up regardless of if she wanted to or not. I rolled the dice and lost."
Nodding, Kerrie smiled softly, but uncertainty reflected in her eyes. "You're still okay with me being here, right? If you've changed your mind, I can wait around for you until it's over."
Bette's heart dropped into her stomach with a thunk. She's giving me an out. Shit, I'm messing this all up. She really thinks I don't want her here.
Shaking her head, she frowned. Why did it always seem like the people from her past were still impacting her current life? What did it matter if her mother was there? Clara Cooper never approved of Shelly. So why should she worry now? Her child was graduating college. She was starting to stand on her own two feet. And the kindest, most compassionate person she'd met sent her belly flipping and her heart thumping, and she wanted to spend time with Bette. Be there for Bette. Flirt with Bette. Touch Bette.
She wasn't losing Kerrie.
Digging deep, Bette repeated in her head, "I deserve to be happy," a few times as her frown turned upwards, and she locked hands with Kerrie. She looked up at the brunette with admiration. "I want you to be here. I'm new to this whole making myself happy thing. I know this has to be hard to see, but I really want you there beside me because other than Zoe, you're the only thing that's going to make me happy today."
Bette watched Kerrie swallow hard, her face briefly betraying how much Bette's words touched her. She nodded and squeezed Bette's hand. "I can do that. If you ever want space, just let me know. I won't get mad, I promise. But unless you tell me that, I'll assume you want whatever this is between us. Does that sound good?"
Bette let out a long-held breath and beamed up at the taller woman. "That sounds great. Now, are you ready to meet the dragon lady who is my mother?"
"I've already met the dragon lady that is your ex. May as well as meet the queen," said Kerrie with a wink.
Bette laughed and tugged Kerrie to start walking. "I hope you don't regret this."
Chapter 20
The crowd was thickening. There was hardly any space to breathe as they all tried to go through the same doors, up the same stairs, all scattered out in close clusters, trying to find a spot. It was impossible to take more than a step without someone in front or behind moving close as well. As they tried to navigate their way, Bette was also looking for her mom. She should have asked where she was seated, but in the moment, it hadn't crossed her mind.
Bette and Kerrie wedged themselves against a railing. Bette searched the crowds while Kerrie provided a protective barrier to the crowds by leaning against the back of Bette. The atmosphere was borderline frantic. Like an enormous game of musical chairs, everyone seemed worried they'd be the one without a seat. Thankfully, after a few minutes of searching, Bette saw her mother on the opposite side they were on, waving her arms.
"She's right there. Looks about seven rows up," half-shouted Bette.
Kerrie nodded, taking Bette's hand and leading her through the throng of people like a large shield. Bette clutched her purse in front of her with her free hand, not trusting how easy it could be to dip a hand in someone's bag. Once at the steps, Kerrie stood to the side and motioned for Bette to go first.
The row Clara was in was all filled up except for two spots beside her. They apologized as they shuffled by a few people seated next to them. Once they arrived at their seats, Bette cringed as Clara stared over her shoulder at Kerrie, her mouth slightly open.Please don't be an ass, Mother. Please don't be an ass.
"Hello, I'm Kerrie Matthews," greeted Kerrie, the smile on her face schooled perfectly, not giving the slightest hint that she was being gawked at like she was an attraction in a circus. She held out her hand.
"My goodness, you're huge."
"Mother!" yelled Bette, causing heads to turn their way.
Without skipping a beat, Kerrie replied back, "Yes, ma'am. That was the way my momma made me. Go big or go home."
To Bette's surprise, her mother appeared to be at a loss for words at Kerrie's quick retort. The older woman simply placed her thin, aging hand in Kerrie's and said, "I'm Clara. Clara Cooper."
"It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Cooper. I can see where Bette gets her beauty from."
"Oh, well, thank you," said Clara, a slight blush tinging her cheeks.
As they took their seats, Bette leaned in close, touching Kerrie's arm to get her attention. She made sure to keep her voice low enough that her mother couldn't hear her. "Did you seriously just flabbergast the dragon lady?"
Kerrie winked at her. "Not my first dragon lady. The key is to disarm them up front. It probably won't last, but it'll get us through the graduation."
The pomp and circumstance of graduations always fascinated Bette. Everybody puts effort into their appearance to present the best versions of themselves. Squeezed into an auditorium or gymnasium so tightly that they could hear the person beside them breathing. All so they could see their child walk across a stage. There would be mothers crying. Fathers would be smiling with pride, and on the outside, everything would look perfect. It felt like an accomplishment to be a part of the moment.
But if one were to take a really close look, they would see the cracks in the facade. Babies crying and old men nodding off. Family members turned away from each other because they didn't want to see them to begin with, but the graduation forced them to be in the same room. Mothers irritated with fathers because they had to carry all the stuff that they needed to the tiny little seats that made anyone over 140 lbs uncomfortable. People would be sweating but trying not to look like they were. Everyone waiting for their person to be called and then impatiently waiting to get out of there afterwards because they didn't care about the other 100 kids after theirs. Families of students whose last names started with S or W had to suffer until the end, and there was always somebody getting up and leaving just because their person had been called already to walk across the stage. The irritation that would creep up on the people still waiting because it felt disrespectful.
