AllFreeNovel
Share Us
My sisters and Hunter keep a conversation going, occupying me while time feels like it’s dragging. Everything felt so rushed, and now that I’m situated, this waiting game is for the birds.
Finally, my doctor comes in with two nurses to see how far I’m dilated. Hunter stays by my head as they check me and announce I’m fully dilated and they’re going to get everything ready now.
“What does that mean?” Maddie giddily asks. “Is it baby time?”
“Yep, gonna have you start pushing in just a minute, Lennon.” The nurses move effortlessly around the room to setup for delivery. When Dr. Potter and I discussed my birth plan at my last appointment, I told her I wouldn’t have my mom or the father of the baby with me, so I wanted my two sisters in here instead. I hadn’t decided on asking Hunter at that point, but there’s no way I want him to leave now. In fact, my chest tightens of how real and fast this is all happening.
Suddenly, I feel like I can’t do this. It doesn’t feel right.
“Hunter…” I mutter softly, but when he turns and looks at me, I know he heard me over all the commotion.
“Yeah? What is it? Are you okay?” He leans over so we’re only inches apart.
Blinking, I blurt out, “I’m freaking out. I don’t know why.”
“Lennon, look at me,” he demands.
I release a short breath and stare into his intense eyes. “You’re the bravest person I’ve ever met, and I know deep in my heart that you can do this, you hear me? I know you wish Brandon were here with you, but you have to believe he is. He’s going to be watching over you and the baby for the rest of your lives, so use that comfort to give you strength.”
I steady my breathing and nod frantically, tears blurring my vision at how soothing his words are to me.
“You’ve got this, Lennon. I know you do,” he encourages, his tone firm and confident.
“I couldn’t do this without you, Hunter,” I tell him with pure vulnerability. “Thank you for being here. I know this isn’t easy for you.”
“I’m here, Lennon.” He winks, then leans down and presses his lips to my forehead. “No matter what, remember?”
Hunter’s motivational chat distracted me while the nurses finished up everything and now the doctor tells me it’s time to start pushing. Dr. Potter gives directions to Sophie and Maddie who are in charge of holding my feet up while I’m breathing through contractions. When I’m not, I’ll rest them in the stirrups for a few seconds before starting again.
“Got it?” Dr. Potter asks us. “Teamwork.” She flashes me a wink.
“I’m exhausted already,” I tease.
“Don’t say that just yet, Mama. Let’s do a practice push for ten seconds.”
The next ninety minutes test everything inside me as I sweat, curse, and groan. When the doctor says one more push and she’ll be here, I picture Brandon’s face. Tears stream down my cheeks as the sadness of him not being here hits me harder than ever before, and I use every ounce of bitterness I have to push as hard as I can.
Then the world stops.
And my body proves it’s much stronger than I ever thought possible. When I finally take a breath, I feel her little body being placed on my chest. The nurses wipe her clean as I look at her precious face looking back at me with a what the fuck just happened expression. I laugh-sob at how much I already love her. Her arms and legs flail and stretch as she tries to cry, and I’m too in shock to know what I’m supposed to do.
“She’s gorgeous, Lennon,” Sophie says.
“She really is,” Maddie adds.
They’re both tearing up and staring at my precious girl.
“Hey, baby,” I whisper, my bottom lip trembling as I brush a finger against her cheek. “You’re finally here.”
“Do you want to cut the cord, Daddy?” a nurse asks, and the four of us freeze.
“No, I think Mommy should,” he answers without missing a beat. “She’s the one who did all the work, after all.”
I look up at Hunter with tears in my eyes, and though my vision is a bit fuzzy, I see the admiration in his expression, and I want to pull him into the biggest hug for being here for me. He encouraged me nonstop, let me squeeze the shit out of his hand, and whispered in my ear not to give up when I felt I couldn’t do it anymore.
He’s truly one of a kind.
The next couple of hours are insane. My head spins as everything happens so fast. I cut the cord, they stitch me up, finish cleaning up the baby, then hand her back to me all wrapped up. My emotions bubble over at the realization that she’s really mine. My little girl.
