Islam a fist onto the table. “Why did you bench me? I could’ve handled studying and playing.”
“And how would you have learned how important studying is if I didn’t set boundaries and give you repercussions?”
“It’s not up to you,” I argue. “The principal can give me detentions, suspensions, or expel me. Why is it up to you?”
He leans over his coffee. “Because believe it or not, I care about you.”
I fold my arms, sinking lower on the seat. “Well, thanks, I guess.”
“I want you to do better so you can get back on the team. Take it as an extra incentive that theyreallyneed you.”
I blow out a hard breath. “They already hate me for missing practice. I can just imagine what they’ll say on Monday morning.”
“They just need to put in as much practice as you’re doing with studying,” Coach says with a wry smile. “I need more than one star player.”
I laugh and stand up. “Thanks, Coach. I needed an ego boost.”
“It’s true, kid. You’re my star.” He opens wallet and places some cash on the table. “A little extra for all your effort.”
My heart swells. “You didn’t have to do that.”
He stands and pats my back. “You’re doing good, Jamie. Keep it up.”
I thank him again, and he leaves the cafe. I pick up the money and move behind the counter. I close out his table, pocket his generous tip, and tell Laura I’m taking a break.
After whipping together a loaded sandwich, I seclude myself in Aunt Maddy’s office. Kicking back in her desk chair with my feet on the desk, I stretch my arms above my head and listen for a crack in my back.
“Ahh.” It purrs out of me with relief.
I slip my feet off the desk and pick up my sandwich. With a big bite, I flip through the notes I brought with me. I stop on Mom’s diary. This book has become a security blanket. Keeping it close has me feeling protected. There’s been such a disconnect between me and Mom’s presence for the past few years.Now it’s like she’s back and telling me all her secrets. I’m weirdly missing Gandalf right now, and I need one of her stories.
I flip through Mom’s diary and stop on a page framed with hand drawn love hearts. My heart pitter-patters, and I read over what she wrote.
I’ve never loved a single living thing more. I can’t believe how natural and fulfilling it feels to hold my baby girl in my arms. All I want to do is to protect her from the hideousness of this world. I see every time someone gives me a disgusted look for being her mom at such a young age. It’s every time I leave the house with her. I never want my baby to be looked at like that. But at least I know I can be strong and have her back. I won’t let her be teased and ridiculed and hurt. I will take it to protect her and Maddy. I don’t want either of them to suffer. I will take all the hits for them.
I swipe at my watering eyes, but it doesn’t stop the stinging tears from erupting. I suck in a ragged breath.Oh, Mom. I know you tried your best.
She didn’t even know how little time we’d have together, and she still made up for it. Aunt Maddy and I are doing fine. I could live without the bullying at school, but I think those girls are lucky my mom’s not around to flush their heads in a toilet bowl.
The imagery makes me chuckle, and I wipe my eyes clear.
Love comes to life from her handwriting on the page. It truly makes me glad Gandalf was a simulation that lasted only two nights. It’s unfathomable to be so loyal and protective of another person for the rest of my days.
I put the diary aside and pick up my phone for a mindless scroll. Before I can think about which app to open, my attention zooms in on a text from Kai.
“Hey, Tabby wants to watch a movie. Our session time is in twenty minutes, and it runs for two hours. Let me know where you’ll be after work and I’ll pick you up after I drive her home.”
My hand shakes as I grip my phone. Pain radiates down my neck from gritting my teeth so hard. Never has the phrase ‘blood boiling’ meant more. I drop my phone onto the desk, afraid I’ll snap it in two. I swipe my clammyhands against my apron and let out a furious, yet muffled yelp. Steam hits my face as I snort hard.
Did I imagine it, or did he not beg me to hang out with him the minute I finished work? He promised to find a balance between me and his girlfriend. However, the minute she has him alone, he goes back on his word.
I snatch my phone and hurriedly text a response.“Don’t bother. I’ll stay home after work.”
“Don’t be huffy. It’ll only be an hour, maybe 90 mins after your shift.”
“That is until she decides she wants to do something else with you. Don’t make me any more promises you can’t keep.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t think it was a big deal. Do you want me to cancel on her?”
