And it’s never at her.
Innocent bystanders bear the brunt of my aggression. Hence the importance of volunteering at the St. Mark’s Hospital. I have some serious karma cleansing to do.
As I gather a wad of bubbles, Dax Malone pops into my head again. Dang, I’d just gotten rid of him. What is it about this boy that makes him stick? He’s an irritating, scruffy smoker, who’s possibly in trouble with the law.
I exhale hard and focus on the heat of the water.Snap out of it, Vanessa. He hasn’t made your heart flutter. You’re mistaking that feeling for repulsion. He’s not worthy of being in your brain.
Stop thinking about him.
Five
Beforedressing,Islipinto a bathrobe and apply my makeup on the fluffy stool in front of my vanity mirror. Claudia stands behind me, fanning a blow-dryer over my hair to create some volume. She gives me two braids atop my head, letting the rest of my hair sweep past my shoulders in carefully created waves.
Claudia then chooses three outfits from my closet, and I pick a white dress with a dusty pink and fuchsia floral design. This is the perfect early-spring dress. It has a sweetheart neckline, with a thin, netted lace covering the decolletage. A jeweled brooch sits above the pointed toe of my dusty pink heels, and Claudia selects a matching purse, readying me for the country club.
On the drive into town, I keep my head down, pointed at my uninteresting phone. Not that Roger and I usually talk, but this trip feels especially prickly. He’s the only person who knows I went to The Scorpions Motorcycle Clubhouse. He must think I’m such a fool. Or, at the very least, be wondering where my lack of judgment came from.
I’d also like to know.
When we pull up outside the country club, I wait for Roger to leave his seat and walk around to my passenger door. I give him a courteous smile as he moves to let me out.
“Any idea of what time you’ll finish dinner, miss?” Roger asks.
I shake my head. “No, sorry. Sometimes the girls like to go into town for ice cream afterwards.”
Roger’s smile grows, endeared by the innocent act. “Very well, miss. Have a lovely evening.”
“Thank you, Roger.”
My heels click as I make my way toward the front glass doors. The doorman tips his hat, opening the door for me. I discreetly pull a bill from my purse and hand it to him on my way through.
“Good evening, Miss Ashworth,” Gregory, the front of house manager, greets me with open arms. “So lovely to see you again.”
I lean in and kiss his cheek. “Thank you, and you too.”
“Your table is ready,” Gregory says, leading me to the dining room. “Your two guests are already seated.”
Gregory has a server escort me to my table. Despite the string quartet playing, tension stretches through my body. Chatter buzzes around the room, and like a reflex, a fake smile plasters on my face.
Hope and Sylvie sit across from each other at our usual table. A yellow and white flower arrangement nestles in a golden vase on the beige linen, surrounded by tall water glasses and perfectly polished silverware.
“Hi Ness,” Hope and Sylvie say in unison with eager waves.
I tuck a wave of blonde hair behind my ear, sitting as the server pushes in my seat from behind. “Hi ladies.”
The server fills my glass with sparkling mineral water, and I thank him with a tip.
“How was your shift at the hospital?” Sylvie asks, swirling her water glass. “I don’t know how you stand it.”
“I’m telling you, girls, it’s so rewarding to see the patients’ happy faces after I read to them.” Even though I don’t want to ask them, my mother’s voice is in my head. “Would either of you be interested in volunteering?”
Nervous laughter sizzles out of them.
Sylvie hunches, finding my eyes. “Wait. You’re serious?”
I swallow hard and force a smile. “Mm-hmm. It could be a fantastic way to help drive donations.”
Hope winces. “Maybe. It just makes me squeamish.”
