Ramsey was suddenly very sure that she knew more about him than he realized. Maybe she’d even known this whole time, and she’d managed to bury that knowledge down deep. Didn’t let it impact any of their interactions.
From the beginning he liked her, but now, there was a bone-deep appreciation and affection. Both that she knew and also that she never said anything.
“Proud of you,” she said, and he opened his mouth to say something typically self-deprecating, but before he could, Marsha continued, her tone firming. “But that doesn’t mean you’re back on the ice and everything’s all hunky-dory now. You still gotta work hard.Keepworking hard.”
Ramsey swallowed hard. “I can do that.”
She nodded sharply. “You’d better.”
Patting him one last time on the arm, she gestured towards the ice. “You’d better get out there, bud.”
Ramsey didn’t need another invitation. He took his first step, hesitant but sure, and then he was skating, again, cold breeze whistling in his ears. The ice was fast and smooth, his blades cutting through it like nothing. Like it wasn’t a big deal, like he hadn’t been dreaming about this for months and months. Sure at some point that he wouldn’t get it again.
For the first rotation around the rink, he just let himself feel. The wind. The ice. The chill. The blades beneath his feet, slicing sharply.
Joy filtered through his whole body.
He knew what people liked to say, sometimes, when they got catty and mean. That he only wanted hockey because of whatit could do for him. That he’d only played to get into his foster dad’s good graces. That he’d only excelled so Daniel wouldn’t send him back into the system.
But from the first time he’d stepped onto the ice, Ramsey had found a home that he’d gotten lucky enough to experience in the first nine years of his life.
It wasn’t just the ice. Or the game. It was the team, which became his family.
It was one of the reasons he’d resisted leaving college, though the Wolves had told him they wanted him after his junior year.
He’d just begun to amalgamate into hisnewWolves family when the second concussion had hit him,hard.
The doctors had never been able to explain why he’d been able to shake off his first one, his senior year of college, so easily, but the second one had sidelined him and sidelined him andsidelined him.
Until he’d genuinely begun to wonder, in the dark corners of his mind, the shadowy parts he couldn’t hide from, if he was never going to make it back again.
But here he was. Back again, and fighting to stay back.
He and the Wolves training staff had discussed certain drills that they wanted him to do. Easy things, really. But as Ramsey rediscovered skating again, everything felt new and beautiful and exciting again.
By the time he got off the ice, he felt lit up with joy. Practically glowing with it.
Marsha gave him one look and said, “Had fun out there, huh?”
“Yeah.Yeah.”Ramsey felt wild with it, almost like he was nine again and he was high on the thrill of finding something he loved that much.
Or, in this situation, finding something he loved that muchagain.
The joy spiraling through him made him reckless. Made him crazy.
Made him pull his phone out when he got back to the locker room. Before he even started shedding his gear, he unlocked it. Pulled up his convo with Nate.
It was precisely the kind of text he’d unequivocally tell everyone he knew not to send. An excuse to open dialogue. No purpose in it whatsoever except to get attention, and Ramsey had never begged for anyone’s attention in his whole life.
But he felt dangerously close to begging for Nate’s.
Had a really fucking good day.
He forced himself to put the phone down. To take off his gear carefully, piece by piece. Head to the showers.
Wouldn’t let himself pick it up again until he was dressed in a pair of loose sweats and big thick sweatshirt, bundled up against the November chill.
When he did, Nate had replied.
