There will be others?
There will be others?
What the hell does that mean? How many others? And why?
9
Jensen
LucienandBransonarein a complete state. Both of them are beside themselves with worry that I’m living in a big old house, thousands of miles from home, with an unmated alpha who has the ability to reduce omegas to bedraggled messes.
It’s wonderful.
They both definitely still love me, and they’re missing me like crazy. There’s no doubt about it.
It’s been a couple of weeks since the strange, late-night incident, and things have settled back into a semblance of a normal routine. Yes, I do still take a walk to the stables most mornings, but it’s because Gregor is a wonderful horse. He truly is. He’s so playful and strong, and he has a very sweet personality.
Not that I’ve interacted with him per se. Heavens no. I’m scared shitless of horses. But if I wasn’t, he’s the kind of horse I’d get along with really well. I can tell.
Anyway, that’s why I go down to the stables in the mornings. To see Gregor. Mainly.
Every morning, without fail, I witness the alpha and the stallion dance together, and it’s beautiful. Every morning, I feel sure the alpha will be a different person when he arrives at the breakfast table. Softer. Gentler. More animated and alive.
Every day, I’m proven wrong.
I’ve been at Beaumont Craven House for over four weeks now, and the strain of the silent meals has officially gotten to me. It’s more than the silence that bothers me. It’s my total preoccupation with a very difficult alpha.
It’s my determination to create a backstory for him that makes sense. It’s become something I can’t stop thinking about. A mystery I’m fixated with.
There’s something about Lord Augustus that scares me. A shrill sound in my brain when I’m with him. A warning that I should tread lightly when I’m around him.
He’s not like other alphas I’ve met. He’s impossible to read, for one thing, and for another, his motivations are unclear. On top of that, I’m absolutely convinced he doesn’t like me. I doubt he’s wasted so much as a second thinking about me since I got here. I doubt he even knows my first name.
In addition to the million different ways I could be humiliated if I don’t extricate myself from this situation, if I’m not careful, something way worse could happen: my imagination could break free. It could run rampant. And I could start thinking Lord Augustus isn’t really an asshole, he’s just misunderstood.
No good could come of that, believe me.
The risk posed by my overactive imagination has become such a real and imminent threat that I finally plucked up the courage to talk to Mrs. Thompson about it yesterday.
“Do you think Lord Augustus would mind if I took my meals with you?” I asked over a mid-afternoon cup of tea.
She crinkled her nose the way she does when she’s mulling something over, and then said, “Oh, I don’t think he’d mind. He’d probably be only too happy to have the dining room to himself again. He’s a loner, our lord. Keeps to himself, doesn’t he? He was positively over the moon when Aurelia decided to take her meals in her room, so I’m sure he’ll agree. Of course that Aurelia didn’t even think of asking to dine with us. Oooh, she was a right piece of work, wasn’t she?”
“She definitely was,” I agreed heartily, though I’ve never met Aurelia. Mrs. Thompson and I have spoken about her at such length that I feel like I know her, and she’s not my cup of tea. Not at all.
“Leave it with me,” she said. “I’ll have a word with him when I see him tomorrow.”
I had an interesting night of mulling things over in my nest. And while I admit there were moments when I felt unsure of my decision to stop dining with Lord Augustus, now that the sun is up, things are a lot clearer.
Of course it will be much, much better for me to have my meals with Mrs. Thompson, Sid, and the rest of the household staff. It will be a weight off my shoulders.
I can’t believe I didn’t think of it sooner.
It’s obvious Lord Augustus finds spending time with me an incredible bore, so I’m sure he’ll be delighted by the plan.
Does it sting that I’ve been here for over a month and haven’t managed to make him like me even a little bit? Yes. Of course. I’m human. I want everyone to like me, so obviously, it doesn’t sit well with me. Not only that, but I’m certifiably hot, so I can’thelp finding it odd that he hasn’t noticed me even a little, but whatever.
I’m removing myself from the situation, and that’s some A-plus adulting and sensible decision-making right there.
