ALANA
It wasn’t a real date.
In theory, I knew that, yet I was standing in front of my bedroom mirror, having tried on the fifth boring outfit.
I couldn’t be seen with Eden fucking King dressed like a grandma.
Come on, Alana, you got this.
It was just a coffee after classes, nothing big. All we wanted to do was discuss how to handle our fake relationship or whatever it was supposed to be.
Was it a fake relationship when he’d try to help me get together with Austin and make me more confident, while all I had to do was hand him a few recipes?
I looked into my mirror, my eyes instantly zooming in on my belly, wishing it was flatter. My thighs seemed bigger in the pair of pants I chose, so I knew I’d run right back to my closet to find a better one in just a moment.
With every passing second that I stood in front of this stupid, wall-length mirror, I noticed more flaws in myself.
My eyes were too big for my head, or perhaps they were too small. My nose was too crooked… or perhaps it was too straight? I wasn’t sure yet, but something was wrong with my nose, for sure. My lips were too thin and my ass too flat for a bigger girl.
Or maybe my lips were too thick and my ass too fat?
I didn’t know, but either way, it was all wrong. I looked wrong.
“Oh, God,” I muttered under my breath as I turned away from the mirror. Taking a deep breath as I reapproached my closet, I went back to searching for something,anythingokay-ish looking to wear.
In the end, I settled on a pair of blue jeans, an oversized, grey T-shirt that I made sure covered my belly, and a black zip-up hoodie. That had to cover at least some of my flaws, right?
After classes, I was waiting at Claire’s for Eden’s arrival.
We hadn’t seen each other all day, which I sort of expected. We only had two classes together, neither of which was part of today’s schedule. He had a different friend circle than I. The only person we had in common was Asiya, and I was pretty sure she only liked him because she had to.
At this point, I’d been waiting for two hours, and I was beginning to think he wouldn’t show up when all of a sudden, the door to Claire’s opened, and he came walking inside. Each step was drowned in confidence as he walked past other college students, not even batting an eye at them, despite the girls fawning over him.
Come on, this was a bit exaggerated, even for Eden King. He wasn’t a superstar. All he had was sort of famous parents, a good-looking face, a trained body, and a pretty smile.
I was expecting a nice greeting, but what I got instead was a questioning look as he sat down on the opposite side of me.
“Something wrong?” I asked, uncertainty in my voice.
“What are you wearing?” His eyes widened as he probably realized how rude that question sounded.
Honestly, I wasn’t even surprised by his question. I’d gotten asked way worse before.
Still, I could immediately feel myself getting more self-conscious. What would the people think if they saw Eden with me?
“I apologize, Ally-Bear. That was a dick thing to ask,” he said. “I didn’t even mean it like that. I was just wondering why you’re so… hidden?”
“Hidden?” I tried to play the awkwardness off with a chuckle.
Hidden described my look pretty well, but it still wasn’t nearly as covering as I had liked.
“Last Friday, you showed so much skin and wore a cute blue dress. Yesterday you wore a long skirt and a tight, sort of cropped, long-sleeved sweater. What happened today?”
First of all, why did he remember my outfits?
My fingers dug into the fabric of my pants, suddenly feeling a lot more uncomfortable in my own skin again.
My heart was racing, my palms sweating.
