Alana was the summer on a winter day. She was the last note of a symphony, lingering in the silence. She was a firefly in a world of fluorescent light.
But most of all, she wasmyAlana, the one who had chosen me amidst a world of possibilities.
The one who could make me both fall to my knees and soar to unimaginable heights.
The one who had become the very air I breathed, the rhythm of my heart and the fire in my soul.
Part of me wanted to walk right over to her, grab her face in both of my hands, and look right into her eyes when I told her all of this. But I couldn’t let her know. Not yet. Not ever.
I was just her little practice run, and that was all I was ever going to be. I had to accept that.
“I’m not a lot of things,” she finally said. “I mean, I candoa lot of things. But usually, I’m just the girl who is overseen by everyone. So, being calledsomethingmeans I’m being seen.”
I nodded slowly, trying to understand where she was coming from, but I couldn’t decipher a meaning anywhere. “I see you, Alana.”
“Yes, I know. It’s just?—”
“You’re more than just a label or a title. And, by the way, I’m not sure being called apuck bunnyis such a nice thing. Most people think of it as a bad thing. Maybe you need to startshowing people whoyouare, not the version you think they want you to be. I like the Alana I’ve gotten to know. The real her.”
Alana let out a soft but long breath. “You make it really hard for me to dislike you.”
I grinned at her comment, knowing she was right.
She was making it incredibly difficult to keep my feelings under wraps.
“It’s my pleasure.” I bowed down to her, making her laugh before rushing over to my bathroom to get her a towel.
As soon as I returned, Alana spoke before I could open my mouth. “I have decided that I’m not a puck bunny. After all, we are dating. Technically.”
Dating.
We weren’t dating. I mean, we were definitelysomething, and dating was part of it in a way. In a very fake way.
“Hmm… I haven’t heard you asking me to be your boyfriend.” Reaching for the blanket, I pulled it off Alana, expecting her to protest, but she didn’t.
“Oh, wow. You’re such a princess.”
“Well, one of us has got to be.”
35
ALANA
“Looks like you’ve hadsomeevening.” Asiya chuckled as we sat down in the cafeteria for lunch.
It was the first time I’d seen her today, and I kind of wanted her to talk about anything other than what Eden decided to leave on my neck. Not just my neck, actually, but thankfully the rest of the hickeys Eden left on my body weren’t visible to anyone but me.
“Is it that obvious?” I asked, covering the hickey on my neck with a hand.
“Uh, yes?” Asiya reached for her taco, not yet biting into it. “Why didn’t you cover it up?”
I sighed, taking my fork into my hand just to play with my salad. It gave me a reason to avoid direct eye contact at all costs. “I tried to, but apparently, I need a better concealer.”
“We can go shopping after classes if you like,” she offered.
I shook my head. “I’m going out with Eden.”
Well, I wasn’t technicallygoing outwith him. We were still working on his Mille-feuille skills, though they looked better each time he tried to bake them. Eden had mastered a simple cake so far. He could also decorate a cupcake, though they’requite easy to bake anyway. The trickiest part was the frosting, but he did a great job with that one.
